Parenting Isn't for Pansies

The Circle of Life Goes On

2011-01-18T11:42:00.004-05:00

Sometimes I like to forget. For instance, I can easily forget I've given up canned caffeine when presented with a cool, delicious 'silver bullet' with lime. And I can periodically forget that I'm heading downstairs after my hubby leaves each morning to torture myself on the treadmill. But what I really like to forget is how old I am. It is like my mind just can't wrap itself around the fact that I'm not still in my late 20's or early 30's. Time is standing still. At least for my mind. Sadly, my body isn't following suit.

Every once in awhile something puts itself right in front of you and it won't let you forget. You can't ignore it. It just is. And you know it. That happened yesterday. And I am still trying hard to grasp the reality it presents.

Yesterday my niece gave birth to the first of our family's next generation. I realized I was becoming a "Great Aunt" but I preferred to think of myself as a just a wonderful "great Aunt" and figured I could continue to forget the reality of the situation. You know. Semantics and all. It is a great coping skill when you are in denial. :) And it was working! Pretty well, actually. And then the new Grandparents had to spoil it all.

I heard the dinging of my phone and knew a new message had arrived. I picked it up and noted a new media message had arrived entitled "Gramps". "Great!" I thought. My parents had managed to get it together and get over to the hospital to see the baby! How awesome! And then I opened the picture.

There, sitting peacefully, was my brother holding the new baby. My Brother! Who is 17 mos older than me. A new Grandpa. I stopped breathing and just stared for a moment. The reality was that we are really old enough to be grandparents, great aunts, and great uncles. While I'm just almost 7 years from having given birth for the last time myself, my niece is just beginning the process once again for the next generation. Lance is the first. I'm sure there will be more to come. After all, there are five more 'cousins' to grow up and get married. I'm even looking forward to becoming a grandparent someday, too. When the time is right.

And perhaps, just perhaps, Lance has allowed me to begin to realize that intense parenting does end, grandparenting will begin. And in it all, I will be ready. At least physically.

Time Enough

2011-01-11T15:08:00.003-05:00

I can barely recall the days when I used to hit the alarm clock two or three times before getting up. Or how often I went over to do lists in my mind between the alarms or while actually doing my hair as I got ready to head to work. But I do think that those days were easier. Could it just be that realities fade somewhat as they become memories? Do we prefer to remember only the good things, and not so much the more stressful things? Or is parenting and schooling at home really the hardest thing I've ever done?

Yes, that must be it. Really!

Take this week for instance. Yes, I plan a week at a time now. I used to plan for months back in the day, but now I settle for a week at a time. And sometimes a day at a time. It just makes more sense. And I am the first to admit that I have less control than I used to. Yes, less control. Before, being in charge meant that I could request progress/activities, and while there might have been griping under a few breaths now and then, it generally got done. There were deadlines. And my paycheck depended on them. As did many others. So they guided my life.

Now my 'deadlines' are fluid. I am raising children. I am not in charge of them. They must make their own decisions. It is my job to train, guide, teach and direct, but ultimately they will need to make decisions on their own. And live with the consequences. And I want them to generally make good decisions based on strong biblical principles, have strong relationships, be true disciples for the Lord, read wonderful books, do necessary math without struggle, and enjoy learning for learning sake. So I am very flexible. Because I am a parent. Of children. Who are ever-changing.

Okay, now back to my week...

It was my goal this week to stick to our schedule, make sure we made adequate progress in our school work, maintain a pleasant, encouraging attitude in a clean house, guide my growing children in thinking beyond their needs, get the laundry done including folded and put away, and make dinner at least 5 nights this week without depending on quick fix things like hot dogs. And I have other goals, too. Things like making sure I spend some time each day in the Word and with the Lord, praying over my children and their individual needs, reminding my husband of the reason we thought getting married was the absolute best idea in the world all those years ago, and coloring my hair while spending some time with my Mom are on the list, too. If you add in the necessary things like keeping milk and bread stocked in the frig, getting Laura to therapies and dance classes on time, making sure the boys shovel the three feet of global warming that falls in our driveway, and baking cookies for my troops, you can see my eyes glazing over.

But last week I realized something. Something I apparently was missing before. I discovered time. Time with the kids doing, well, nothing. You know. Like watching movies while not cutting out something for a school game, stitching, or reading at the same time. Just talking to them about whatever comes to mind without listing on ebay or carrying clothes down the stairs at the same time. And time to myself. Before everyone else but Don wakes up. Time to just sit quietly. Listening. To the snow fall. Or the cars drive by as the world wakes up outside.

I'm sure the kids wonder why I am not doing something else while I'm doing something, but they haven't complained. And if they saw me sitting, just sitting, before I started my day in the Word, I'm sure they'd have even more to consider. But I've discovered something valuable here. It is a hard job that I do every day. But it is doable. Maybe not to the ultimate standards that someone else may set for themselves, but at least I'm here. Home with my children. Molding their hearts and minds every day. To the best of my ability.

And some day... yes, some day, they will be thankful. And I will be wondering why my to do list is so small.

Mommy? Do You Know What I Want Most In Life?

2011-01-07T11:13:00.005-05:00

After finishing phonics this morning I assigned Laura to run a few circles around the house. She was getting antsy and a bit bored with oddball sounds -ink, -ank, -onk, and -unk. So I figured a bit of exercise would be a good thing.

After 6 or 7 rounds, she jogged over to my desk for a quick rest. She reached out and took my arm and said "Mommy? Do you know what I want most in life?" I realize she's six, and whatever she is about to say will most likely be a fleeting desire that will come and go quicker than the sun in NE OH, but I turn to face her knowing that right now, this is a biggie for her. I immediately start thinking about how I'm going to deter her apparent never-ending request for a 'walking pup' as I'm sure that's what will fall out as soon as she opens her mouth.

But I was wrong.

"Mommy? Do you know what I really, really, really want most in life?" I shake my head and smile to encourage her to continue. "I want to go to bed without wearing shoes."

As I reach out to give her a great big hug, I hide the tears that are forming in my eyes. I can't tell her how many times I've wished and prayed, and prayed and wished for the very same thing. Or how many times I have wondered just how much longer she'll have to wear them since she's already several years past the norm. Or how often I've wondered if we will ever really be able to let go of the constant monitoring of her feet and if her big toe will ever go down to a normal position.

And then I glance down to her heels. Her straight, flat heels And I smile. The Lord has been good. He brought Dr. Dobbs and Kristina in to our lives and I am forever thankful. There will be a time when she can go to bed without shoes. And there will be a time when we don't automatically look at her feet as she runs by. And there will come a time when all of this will just be what happened back then.

As I pull away from her and touch her cheek with my hand, I tell her that someday she'll have her desire. Someday she'll go to bed without shoes. And until then we'll just keep doing what we should. She shakes her head yes, smiles and goes back to running circles in the house. On her flat feet. Just like every one else does.

January Really Arrives Tomorrow

2011-01-07T09:42:00.002-05:00

After a quiet morning start, I spent some time planning. After all, that's what women do. We plan. We have to know what is going to happen, how it is going to happen, who will most likely help it happen, and what we think we're going to gain from it happening. And today I was planning the weekend.

Weekends here are not your average, normal, two days off from life. Instead they seem to increase the pace of life, demanding that we just do our best to keep up. If you are laughing, then I know you are a kindred spirit. If you are clueless, I'm assuming you can teach me something and we need to make a date for coffee...

This weekend I have determined that it is time to say goodbye to all of the warmth, clutter and decor of the holiday season. Our trees, decorations, wreaths and bells must once again just be a part of our memories for another 11 months. The plain, stark feeling that January brings will arrive right along with a few more inches of blowing and drifting 'global warming'. But in the end, it will feel really good to have the house organized once again. Really. It will. I'm sure of it.

I'll let you know how that goes...

New Year, New Knowledge

2011-01-05T10:36:00.003-05:00

My son said it best on New Year's Eve. He stated "Goodbye 2010! May 2011 be much better!". I couldn't agree more, but I'm sure for very different reasons.

I've learned much in the past year. Things like more patience in parenting, picking the correct battles to fight, how callouses on your knees may be the best offense when raising teenagers, and how lack of organization really effects life have been biggies on the list of learning for 2010. But I still seem to be struggling with simple learning processes like time management, menu planning, making laundry exciting, and the ever present weight management thing. I suppose there is some give and take in any learning moment. For instance, if we are concentrating on learning how to converse with someone who is 17 with grace and patience, it is really hard for our brain to wrap around why we feel compelled to shove that fourth cookie in our mouths without even thinking. Or if we are in the midst of working our way down the to do list of crises at the moment, it is almost impossible to stick basic laundry in the mix.

So in the great scheme of things, I believe I'm going to concentrate on things just a month or two at a time. If I learn in those few months, then I can adjust my goals for the next few and so on. Sounds rather sane, doesn't it? But really, the bottom line for me is not what my goals really are, but that in doing all that I am doing, that I put the Lord at the center of the process. If I truly want a 'new beginning' all I really need to do is focus on Him. After all, His Word, His manual for life, His Book starts with the very wise words "In the beginning God..." If he is first, more important that what I have, more important that what I think I need to do, then he'll be in charge. I won't have to be. How freeing is that?!?!?!?!

Here's to a wonderful, exciting new year of learning, growing and becoming what God intends for me to be.

WOO HOO!!!!!

2010-08-04T11:37:00.002-04:00

I just had to take a moment and post our good news of the day. The week! The month!!! After our visit to our eye specialist, he released Laura from any patching!!! No more wondering how long it has been on or if it is on the right eye for the day. No more listening to her get frustrated. No more trying to remember where we put the patches or attempting to match her outfit. We're done!!!

PRAISE THE LORD!!! God is SOOOOO GOOD!!!

Final St. Louis "Drive By" This Fall?

2009-11-13T11:27:00.003-05:00

As you can see from the smiles above, Laura is about to get her final set of casts off during what we hope is a final St. Louis drive by for 2009. Kristina popped them off quickly despite Laura's needless fussing (her face below is just recovering from all of that fussing...) and she had time to sit, stretch, and generally enjoy her freedom before we put on our new night shoes. We've moved from the Mitchell's, which we have had since birth, to the Dobbs molded brace to see if it works better for her special issues. So far, she's not fussed at night and I'm happy to say both Mommy and Daddy have figured out how to put them on well. Yeah for Daddy! And Yeah for Dr. Dobbs (our own personal 'genius') and Kristina (definitely the woman behind the Dr!) who have done so much for Laura's future.

God is just soooo good!!!

Blessed Be The Tie That Binds?

2009-10-25T17:06:00.002-04:00

I know. I know. He's handsome. Especially in a tie. But be prepared, girls. He won't be ready for his own wedding for another dozen years or so!

Ka and Jarryd's Special Day

2009-10-25T16:05:00.006-04:00

Yesterday, a new family was created and ours grew. All at the same moment. The first in the youngest generation of our family was married. Ka and Jarryd shared their vows before the Lord in front of family and friends in a very sweet ceremony, and without a quiver. Confident and smiling, they couldn't have been more relaxed or sure that their union was indeed blessed.

In true Mikayla fashion, she went a bit against the norm. Not only did she not wear high heels (smart girl!), she did not walk down the aisle to "Here Comes The Bride" (she chose something more melodic to walk to) and she had not only a ring bearer and a flower girl (yes, Laura was her flower girl - even in double casts), but she had a 'flower Dad' as well. You'll see what I mean as you look through the pictures... Poor Don. He did a great job!

Fall Has Arrived

2009-10-25T15:22:00.003-04:00

I love fall. It is my absolute favorite time of the year. Yes, yes, I know. I absolutely LOVE Christmas, too. But fall. There is just something about the beauty of it all, so many colors on the trees, the smells, the sounds, the cooler nights... Yes, I LOVE fall!

Today we decided to take advantage of the sunshine and stopped by a roadside stand to pick up a few pumpkins, gourds and such. Libby was quite the item with the other visitors as well as the owners, and Laura managed to move around through the pumpkins holding Daddy's hands despite her double casts. Jonathan picked out pumpkins for both he and Matthew, and Laura got two. One that was shaped like a heart and the other that she'll actually consent to cut.

I wonder if her special pick will still be around in the family Christmas pictures. Hey, don't laugh! Nothing like reminiscing over some happy holiday photos to discover that you not only maxed out the Christmas decor, but you forgot to do something with the pumpkins! Trust me. I have personal experience!

A Patched Princess

2009-08-08T19:24:00.002-04:00

When you have children, it is always easy to find something to talk about. Their frequent antics provide plenty of fodder. And with Laura we get frequent questions about how her feet are doing and regular comments about how far she has come. But we rarely talk about her vision. It just is. Lately, though, I've had the opportunity to share about it with several other families. We've been stopped in stores, the park and the playground as folks ask about her patch.

Yes, Laura has had some vision challenges. Don has dealt with them his whole life and his Mom has as well. I guess it is just one more way she's very much like her Daddy. Oh, don't get me wrong. We will continue to pray for her daily and we expect her vision to improve. Whether the Lord does it miraculously, or through the work of her pediatric ophthalmologist is still an unknown. So meanwhile, we do whatever we can to help her with that as well.

For the past year and a half or so she's had to wear a patch over her much better eye in order to strengthen her weak one. Currently, she wears it about 6 hours or so a day, often more. And we'll return to the specialist in November to see how she's doing. When we started patching we discovered there were a variety of options, and like the studious Mom that I am, I researched them. Using adhesive patches just wasn't going to work with her - she develops sensitivities to adhesives - so we opted for this model. Since the original, I've purchased several more from the creator and we love the variety. If you need to patch your princess, or prince for that matter, please check out www.goipatch.com for some great, creative options.

Grand Openings? Depends On Your Perspective!

2009-08-01T10:04:00.002-04:00

In my short life as a stay at home/home schooling Mom who likes to think she has time for hobbies, I've experienced the grand opening of a craft store or two in my day. Yesterday I experienced the grand opening of a different sort. I carted four kids two hours away for the grand opening of a new Lego Store that opened in a huge, upscale shopping 'center' built in the new, cozy streets concept. And I just had to note a few differences.

At Craft Stores: They are generally large enough that everyone who shows up can enter as soon as they can squeeze their bodies through the door, hopefully in time to grab a cart on your way by.

At Lego Stores: Since their only purpose is legos, and just how many of those can you have after all, the size is smaller than a normal shoe store and therefore must be monitored for body count or the Fire Marshall will get fussy. This means long, several hour waits snaking around buildings for the poor souls who didn't get there before dawn to start the waiting process.

At Craft Stores: Little children are left at home with the husband who generally is more concerned with the large hole his wife's shopping trip will leave in his wallet than what his kids are doing at any given moment. And he has little understanding of just what the purpose of each carefully chosen and planned for purchase will do for him. Or the need his wife has for a creative outlet, if only in concept.

At Lego Stores: Little children make up 60% of the crowd. And they are excited. Very excited. So excited, in fact, that most feel the need to share with everyone within shouting distance just what set they are going to get to go with the ones they already have when they finally reach their own El Dorado. Well, most of them do. The others are busy playing handheld games and could care less about line etiquette if it impedes their ability to win. The rest of the crowd is made up of equal parts exhausted parents, usually mothers, who are wishing for a tall, cool drink somewhere quiet, and fathers/uncles/grandparents/other men who have a long term love of little plastic pieces and can't wait to spend their money they've been saving for two years to get that long coveted set they can't find at their local store. This group of men send 'scouts' to stand at the store door hoping to catch anyone leaving with 'pick-a-brick' cups so they can preplan what bricks they'll be purchasing when they finally reach the 'wall'. I won't even go in to how this effects what little line etiquette remains.

At Craft Stores: Women who want to browse are given the leeway to do so as long as they don't get in the way of the greater crowd who are there with a list in mind and can't wait to get their treasures and get home to start planning and crafting. Check out lines move smoothly and are well defined by the cash registers ready to receive all of the stuff piled in each cart.

At Lego Stores: Browsers are not expected, and those who want to capture the moment forever on film will encounter the biggest challenge of their day yet. Bodies are in constant motion. Even those who take a moment to be in awe of what Master Builders have created only take a moment before moving on. Check out lines are nonexistent. There's a counter with stressed store employees who just want a moment of silence to calm the buzzing in their brains. Your guess is as good as anyone else's regarding who is next to check out. Calm is only maintained by those parents who take a moment to add up the cost of their several hour wait in the sun and to question their sanity before moving forward, allowing those who don't want to know the chance to hit the cast register before them.

At Craft Stores: Those leaving the store rush to their cars, unload their purchases, abandon their carts and leave as quickly as they can.

At Lego Stores: Those leaving the store want to revel in the fact that they made it in, conquered the store and are victorious in their purchase, and they want to do it with all of those still waiting to cheer them on. Big yellow bags are constantly being opened in front of those who have yet to see a glimpse of their El Dorado, driving up the excitement and creating an even louder plan of action amongst the lego fanatics still in line. And this activity is encouraged by overly cheerful store employees in yellow aprons who are also hot and tired, and trying to remember why it is that they applied for the job in the first place.

But after all is said and done, I can honestly say that those who purchase at the Lego Store are much more likely to actually use their purchase in a timely manner and I am sure there were many boxes being opened even before the cars they were riding in left the parking lot. Oh if only those lego fanatics would give us creative folk some space in the basement and time to create... Just think what we could accomplish! Meanwhile I'll be happy interpreting lego instructions for the newbie in the house as she embarks on her first lego purchase. Heaven help us. If her brothers are the example she's following, we are in trouble!

Conversations With Laura, Part 2

2009-05-22T12:08:00.002-04:00

As she played with her barn this morning, I took note that sheep, cows and horses were not the inhabitants. So this conversation followed:

Me: Who is living in your barn today?
Laura: Fairies, of course!
Me: Oh. Of course.

Play goes on for awhile. Pretty soon a chair appears next to me and then the barn lands on the chair.

Me: Oh my! I didn't know fairies were in the Wizard of Oz...
Laura, looking at me rather sternly: Mom. The fairies want a makeover. One of your makeovers.
Me: So they want their hair done?
Laura: Yes, and makeup and a new outfit and whatever. Like you do for me.
Me: Of course. When should I start?
Laura: Mom! They are lined up in front of you. Can't you see them? You just have to believe. That's all. Just believe. And accept that they are there. Then you'll be able to see them!

Ah, how innocent. Just believe. And accept. So simple, and yet so difficult. And yet it is what the Lord asks. I couldn't help but hum "Trust and Obey" to myself as I gave each and every fairy their very own pretend makeover. :)

Conversations With Laura...

2009-05-21T14:33:00.002-04:00

Laura: Mom? Why is my barn dusty?
Me: Because it sat for a long time without you playing with it.
Laura: But why is it dusty?
Me: There is dust in the air and when something sits still, it collects dust that falls out of the air.
Laura: Can our skin get dusty?
Me: No, not really. Because we are always moving.

Laura freezes and sits totally still for a time, just sitting there smiling.
Then she looks down at her arm, feels her arm and gets this big smile on her face.

Laura: Mom! Feel my skin! It is dusty!

I feel her skin. Uh no. Not dust...

Me: Laura, that's not dust. That's dried snot. You need to use a kleenex.
Laura: Yeah, you're right. It's swot. I will get a kleenex when my arm is full.

I grimace. She smiles gleefully and says: Of dust Mom! Not swot! and runs away laughing.

Welcome to my world.

MILling About...

2009-03-25T07:14:00.003-04:00

I will be the first to admit that the past month has been lacking in creativity, homeschool progress, and yes, even cleaning. But it has been full of comfort, stretching our boundaries, lots of problem solving, family, and a growing love for my mother-in-law.

Jan was taken to the ER early in February for what we now know was apraxia/anoxia, a pulmonary embolism, congestive heart failure, eventual pneumonia, and a few other problems that might seem minor but added to the overall picture of her health. She spent 10 days there and was moved to a nursing home where she stayed until we moved her last week to a wonderful Assisted Living facility just a few minutes from our home that embodies the philosophy of 'aging in place'. She's currently doing very well there and under Dr. Stone's care she is just about back to the Mom we all know. There are challenges yet to overcome, but she's on her way and improving every day. But that's not the journey I wanted to share today. There are more important journeys that have begun, and in these lie the future of our family.

When my slightly larger family merged with Don's rather small one almost seven years ago now, we added just four new members to our family but they added 12. And if you count all of those extended family members, they had to deal with much more than that. And in typical fashion, we embraced their small family and just added them in to the fold. They were a part of all of our family celebrations, invited to every activity, and rejoiced with us when Laura was born. They were family. But I'm not sure that they fully understood what that meant to all of us, not even Don.

Having been on his own for so long it was hard for him to realize that my Dad meant it when he said he'd help with something. And that my parents really expected a call when large family projects were under way. Or that the word "we" really meant "we", as in all of us. I think Diane first truly began to understand just how much we loved her when she joined us for our week at the beach. We trusted her enough to let her see the good and the bad in all of us, to be squished in the car that seats 10 with the other 9 of us, traveling 10 hours through countryside and city traffic with my Dad at the wheel. If ever there was a time that she could choose to bail on us, that would have been it. But she hung in there. And she was even game for planning next year.

After our week at the beach I think Diane began to understand just how much we did love and accept her as a part or our family, but she still held the primary responsibility for Mom and couldn't spend as much time with us as we'd like. Often my Mom and I plan impromptu meals, gatherings and such just because we haven't seen each other since last weekend, we need a project completed together, or we have caramel corn to make by the gallon. While we'd like for Diane to be more a part of these times, it isn't feasible since she's so far away and the demands of life, taking care of Mom's needs, and puppy motherhood keep her schedule pretty full. We miss her, but we continued to pray for the Lord to open up a way for us to be together more.

When Don and Diane realized in February that Jan really shouldn't be living alone any longer, I realized big changes were coming to all of us. As we gathered to start planning what we needed to do, I naturally included my parents. After all, Mom and Dad would be a part of whatever plans we needed to make, even if it only meant keeping Laura occupied while the rest of us sorted, cleaned, prepped and painted. With our usual division of labor in full force, Mom and Dad gently helped us problem solve, and Don, Diane and I decided it was time to relieve Diane from the full responsibility of her Mom. We all decided it would be best if we moved her from the hospital down here to a nursing home. Oh, don't get me wrong. It wasn't an easy decision. Visiting nursing home after nursing home, defining just what assisted living vs. independent living meant, and who could best meet Mom's needs along with ours was more difficult than I ever imagined. But finding places down here that met our needs helped make the decision easier.

Moving Mom here has brought four major changes to our lives so far. First, it meant that Don, and/or the kids and I needed to check in on her daily. Meals don't happen on a regular schedule and figuring out when Mom was awake enough to have a visit was a challenge that we eventually have worked out. Well, sort of. :) Now that she's settled in and is comfortable, sometimes a phone call will do. But I still stop in whenever I'm out running errands during the day and I'm sure Don will continue to stop in regularly as well.

Second, it means that we get to see Diane every weekend. This is one of the best parts of the whole thing. She generally arrives here some time Saturday and stays through dinner, visiting Mom and with us until she feels compelled to head home again. Then she returns most Sundays to have at least a quick visit with Mom. We love her expanded presence in our lives and it is my prayer that through this, she'll come to realize just how much we do love her and enjoy her just because. And it certainly isn't lost on me that the Lord could use this as the final step in getting her to move down our way. :)

The third change certainly effects Don more than it does the rest of us. It seems to have worked out best that Don, being of sound financial mind, take over keeping track of Mom's finances, paying her bills and such. He's good at that sort of thing. But he's good at it because he takes the time to do things like balance checkbooks weekly and file bills after they are paid. Yeah. It was a concept to me, too. :) I'm sure this change will continue to evolve along with the rest, and I know we'll get better at it as he gets all of the accounts settled and her bills added in to his system.

The fourth change is something I didn't expect. And it really has to do with my own definition of family, and who that includes. As you know, I grew up with very loving parents who have spent their lives growing along with my brother and I (they started young!), and raising us with strong moral values and a great picture of what a true family is. I really didn't 'need' another mother in my life and Jan really didn't need me, either. She had Diane. While we were certainly cordial and I respected her as my wonderful husband's mom, I loved her from a distance. As it became more obvious that she would be coming down here for much of the rest of her life I began to ask the Lord to work in me. To make me the DIL he wanted me to be for her. That even though I loved her because she was my husband's Mom, that he would give me a growing love for her so that as I ministered to her needs it would be from the bottom of my heart and not out of duty.

I am not sure what I expected the Lord to really do, but he did what I asked and more. The first time I really realized it was the day Mom moved from the hospital to the nursing home. I was the 'greeter'. After all, every one else works and I had the time. I did the paperwork and waited. Mom was late. It seems a traffic jam was delaying the transport. And I had time to pray some more. By the time Mom arrived, Don was there as well. We settled her in and assessed her immediate needs, helped the staff do what they needed to do and prepared her for bed. Cradling her head in my hands as I said goodbye for the night was such a tender moment - for me anyway. I realized I would do what needed done and what was best for Mom because I loved her. Just because she was Jan. Not because I had to. Not because she was Don's Mom. Just because she is.

And that love has grown in the past few weeks. As we prepared to move her to what may be her last home in this world, I made decisions just as I do for my children. Because I've been given the opportunity to make the world better for her. Just because I love her. I have forced issues that needed to be tended to, and loved her patiently through others. Oh, I've had my moments. But the genuine joy I feel at knowing we've done what we can to make her comfortable, and the tears shed because she's improved so much in the past week are totally genuine. And it makes me very happy to know that we all truly are a family. Lock, stock and barrel.

And I don't think I'm the only one who has a growing love for 'Grandma Jan'. Yesterday morning while talking with Matthew he asked me if I thought the Lord might have moved Grandma Jan down here to be with us so that we could share the Lord more with her and help her develop a true relationship with the Lord before she dies. My son said that. And I didn't hesitate to agree. Of course I didn't let him see my tears. A Mom has to keep something hidden now and then. :)

When we began this new phase of life about six weeks ago, we had no idea what would eventually transpire. Looking back I can see that it has been a long time coming. And I know we will all be better for having gone through it.

Laura's New AFO

2009-02-27T10:08:00.004-05:00

Last week we embarked on a new journey. One where Laura's foot will be held in place by an AFO for awhile. I must honestly say that after fighting it for so long, seeing her foot being held correctly and watching her walk almost normally has done my heart good. Knowing that 'cute shoes' will require a much more diligent search is something I can live with. Meanwhile, we went out and purchased a PT endorsed pair of New Balance tennies that are grey, pink and white. While they don't go with much of her dressier wardrobe, she wears them every day and loves them. And so it goes.

Here are some pictures of her in her AFO. And for those of you who have a kid with atypical/complex feet, you'll relate to the big toe stance well. :)

She's Another Year Older

2009-02-05T14:15:00.004-05:00

Our precious Laura had another birthday this week. She turned five. Five. My baby is five! Where does the time go? How is it that I can barely remember the difficult times we dealt with when she was born? Where did the wee thing we struggled to keep alive go? Was she ever really that tiny and fragile? Did they really diagnose her as a failure to thrive and say she would never develop normally?

Oh if they could only see her now...

They'd find her right where the Lord wanted her, growing healthy and happy in the midst of the family that God made just for her. They'd find her busy taking care of her babies, learning all of the things she needs to know at this stage in her life, helping to make her own birthday cake, and keeping us all on our toes. Who cares that her baby bottles periodically become guns so she can safely traverse through her brothers 'war zone' with her baby in order to 'safwe' get to the grocery store. Or that she knows far too many details about Indiana Jones or Star Wars characters since she loves to get right in the middle of whatever her brothers are doing? What matters is that she is content and loves life, thinks pink is the best thing going as any true princess at heart would, and that she will grow up to be a wonderful, devoted wife, mother, and strong woman of God.

Yes, she's five. Where, oh where does the time go?

Rabbit Run - Especially When It Is Cold!

2009-02-05T13:55:00.002-05:00

One of the benefits you get from a blanket of new-fallen snow is seeing just what lives with you every day in and around your house. Last week a hawk, with his prey clutched in his hand, landed right in front of our window. I realize that he'd wandered outside his normal hunting grounds because of the heavy snowfall, but it was a reminder that nature lives with us despite our human desire to just take over everything in our path.

This morning I was reminded of the little creatures that we've watched grow up under our very own shed. Yes, we've fed generations of the little guys even when we weren't thrilled about it. And their brothers, sisters, cousins and friends live all over our development. This morning it was fun to follow their nightly wanderings around the house, finding all of the spots where they stopped for awhile seeking warmth, and seeing just how they wander in and out of the bushes. In the picture above you can see where they obviously spent some time overnight pressed in to the snowbank for a bit. And I think there was more than one of them cuddling there.

I then found a bunch of little footprints coming out from under the gate. You can see where they've dug a path in the snow under the corner. And on the other side of the house I found where they went back under the fence, as well as several places along the way where they stopped to cuddle for awhile. I couldn't help but wonder what that hawk might have done if he'd seen them out and about. And I realized that as much as they drive me crazy, and as much as I feel frustration as the bunnies eat my plants, I wouldn't want to see one have the same fate as the starling did last week. Remind me of that this spring when I put out new flowering plants, would you?

Digging Out Again And Again

2009-02-05T10:45:00.004-05:00

Ever have one of those things that keeps repeating over and over again, drivng you nuts? Like a song you can't get out of your head? Anyone remember "It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood"? Or perhaps the Barney theme song? Or any other preschool ditty that just popped in to your head? Or how about a commercial that lacks intelligence and yet you can't get it out of your mind? Or some activity that you must do over and over again even though it just may drive you slowly crazy? Or perhaps someone who just keeps following you around when you want some privacy? Yeah. Me, too. And my nemesis is snow. It just won't stop. It keeps coming, and coming. In spurts from a spit to a foot or more. And then more comes the next day. And so on, and so on. You just can't get away from it here.

Here's a picture of the tree in front of the house a few weeks ago. Pretty, isn't it?

And our bush by the driveway fence. I just liked it at that moment. Of course it was the beginning of days of snow so I was feeling generous.

Here is Laura's climber on the back deck. She was amazed with how much snow it held. Little did she know it was only the beginning.

Jonathan went out that afternoon to help the men shovel.

Matthew started on one side of the driveway.

And Don the other.

He worked his way down and around

And here's the whole, beautiful mess before we started to dig out.

It was a beautiful snowfall. And I enjoyed it, if only for a moment. Soon another inch or two joined it. And then even more. And more. It just kept snowing. It snowed so much that January was the second snowiest month ever here. As in all of recorded weather history. Oh goody.

But soon it warmed up. We had two whole days of above freezing temps and sunshine! The snow melted off the roof, the icicles dripped themselves almost dry, and the streets and driveways that had been shoveled and plowed dried up leaving them very passable once again. And all of the snow piled up everywhere started turning that lovely shade of brown. It actually seemed like spring might be early this year. Perhaps Puxatawney Phil knew something we didn't. Perhaps we might dodge the bullet this year! After all, we'd already hit our average snowfall amounts for the whole season and we were only halfway through it.

Alas, it was not to be. Two nights ago and just as the new month got under way, a storm that was only supposed to drop a few inches in a general snow fall hit a newly melted spot over the lake in its way in and picked up steam. Lots of it. Before it ended, this little 'clipper' would drop over a foot of light, crisp snow on a few select counties in the area referred to as the secondary snow belt. Trust me, anything that has the words 'snow belt' in it can't be good. Apparently winter isn't done. Spring isn't near. We are only halfway done. And here's all the evidence you need:

Here's a view from the front porch. The bushes are buried!

And a view from the other side of the bushes. The bench is buried and the windmill is getting close!

The poor bushes! I'm not sure they'll recover completely. But then I feel that way every winter yet they stand majestic once again every spring.

And here's the boys sledding hill they made after the last snowfall and used again last night.

And the mound by the mailbox is growing...

Here it is from the other side. Our poor mailbox. It may get swallowed before long.

And here is Laura's climber and the snow piled up on the deck. Even I was amazed at how much there was.

And our house this morning. You'll note that we have yet to clear the sidewalks. We'll get to that soon. Or it will melt off all by itself. Yeah, that's it. It will melt. Someday soon. Really. Even here. :)

Mitchell Shoes on a Dobbs Bar

2009-01-01T16:28:00.006-05:00

For those of you who are looking for information about the Mitchell shoes on a Dobbs bar, here's what we use. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask here or on the nosurgery4clubfoot group on yahoo groups.

Our setup for our Mitchell shoes on a Dobbs bar

We attached the bar upside down so it did not get in the way of her walking. Here it shows that more clearly.

Here's the bottom of our shoes and bar:

And a closer view of one shoe - note the tab to press that makes the Mitchells easily removed from whatever bar they are attached to, including the Dobbs bar:

And a closer view of the plate and how it fits on to the shoes:

Prayer Works!

2009-01-01T15:02:00.004-05:00

On December 15th we began what we pray is the last phase of Laura's clubfoot treatment. At our Thanksgiving visit Dr. Dobbs determined that a posterior tendon transfer was worth a shot for Laura, and a last ditch effort to cure her stubborn heel varus before an osteotomy would be required. Surgery for Laura hasn't always been an easy thing. She doesn't 'do' surgery well, but then most people don't. So it wasn't as if I was looking forward to it. Well, I might have been. On the inside. Waaaaay on the inside. After all, in my heart I knew this was what we needed to do. But in my head I was not looking forward to letting her go as she headed to OR, or watching her struggle with the pain of recovery immediately after surgery and beyond.

As I packed to go to St. Louis I made sure we had plenty of tylenol, some extra tylenol with codeine, some valium for muscle spasms, plenty of syringes and lots of apple juice to help keep her stomach calm. I planned for the possibility of her nissen letting go should she have an extremely upset stomach, and I packed comfy clothes for both of us as I anticipated spending a lot of time holding and rocking her through her pain, and climbing over seats in the car to get to her when necessary on the way home. I'd been through it before. I thought I knew what to expect.

When we arrived at Shriner's Monday morning, they immediately went to work making her comfortable and catering to her every whim. Lots of stuffed animals, a large playroom well stocked with everything her little heart desired, and pbs kids helped make her feel special. She fussed a bit as the medication began to help her relax as I'm sure she felt a bit funny. But when we released her to the nurses care outside the OR, she was doing just fine. After all, she was almost asleep!

Mom and I headed to get something to eat since we didn't know when we'd have time to do so later that day, and then settled down in a very nice OR waiting room. Soon the call came that she was out and in recovery, calling for me. My stomach sank. The difficult recovery time was upon us. I said yet another silent prayer as I headed to gather her in my arms.

As soon as she was settled in with me on a rocking chair, she drifted off to sleep. No fussing, no frustrations. Just rest. As we moved from the recovery room to her hospital room, she seemed to perk up even more. No extreme pain, no anxiety. Just a smile now and then, a hug for a stuffed animal or two, and a request for some crackers and apple juice.

I knew there were many people at home and across the country praying for her and soon realized the Lord was answering our prayers. My anxiety left as we prepared to take her home to Nana's for a nights sleep before driving home the next day. I'd planned to sleep with her in the living room, but even that wasn't needed. I put her down next to Jonathan, left them watching Noggin for a little while, and headed to bed myself. Mom and I woke up the next morning and marveled at the fact that we hadn't heard from her all night. But mentally I began plotting how to get some of the nasty pain meds in her before we left for home.

It seems I plotted without reason. As I listened to weather forecasts in the bedroom, Mom sat at the kitchen table to read her Bible and pray for a bit. Soon she was greeted with "Good morning, Honey" as Laura crawled down the hall. No crying. Not a whimper of pain. Just a smile to greet us. The Lord had really blessed her. And Mom and I as well. As you can see by the pictures, she was still doing just fine an hour later. We made it home that evening with just a few doses of tylenol needed. And I'm not sure they were for pain as much as they might have been because she was whining due to boredom. But I'm happy that was all. The Lord truly is good.

The troops as we pack to head home:

Nana and Jonathan:

"Dr. Dobbs is a Gen-us!"

2009-01-01T14:36:00.004-05:00

Around here we have what we call 'kid stories'. You know, the innocent things kids say at just the right moment that just have to be shared with other adults in their lives. Things that bring a smile to your face and are often followed by laughter that can't be helped. Sometimes your kids say things that make you think long and hard about how you are parenting. Or they say things that are so true you can't help but know you are raising a child who is truly awesome in their own right. But most often they say things that make us laugh.

The other day a package arrived addressed to Laura. It seems her Shriner's bar had finally given up to the constant pounding it takes each morning and evening, and it had sheered in a spot that couldn't be repaired so we'd been sent a new one. Along with the bar was a pamphlet about the Dobbs bar. Since we're 'old-timers' at the whole FAB thing, I didn't pay much attention to it. But Laura had other plans. Soon she was ooohing and aaahing at the very cute baby pictured inside and asking me who it was along with many other questions about her pink hair bow, how much her Mommy loved her and so on. All usual questions I often must answer about babies we see in magazines, books and so on.

And then she closed up the pamphlet and turned it over. As she spotted a picture of Dr. Dobbs she grew still. Very still. And then ever so slowly her face started to light up. Her eyes grew big, her smile spread half way across her face, and her body quivered with excitement. Then, hugging the pamphlet to her chest she proclaimed "I just LOVE Dr. Dobbs! I love Dr. Dobbs! He's a gen-us, Mommy! A gen-us! I just love Dr. Dobbs!" And in that moment there was no doubting it. She totally loved him.

And in the midst of the moment I prayed that her love with last beyond surgery the following week.

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year!

2009-01-01T13:59:00.003-05:00

Christmas is, well... it is Christmas! An amazing, festive time of year when our house is transformed right along with many others on the block. A time when our family manages to spend a bit more time together, and the boys don't mind my constant singing quite as much. It is a time when there are one or two things that happen that inevitably become part of our family 'legend'. It is a time when I can spend the whole month driving my rather impatient boys nuts giving obscure hints as to the contents of packages that will eventually wind up under the tree with their names on them. Sometimes we don't even put their real names since that might give the whole thing away, so we make up something instead. And this year was no different. This year was the year of the Wii...

And while Mom and Diane worked in the kitchen,

Laura and Daddy played with her new V-Smile game,

And Poppy and Murphy had their own plans...

After all of the presents, food and fun, Libby finally found herself too tired to play, too.

As the season winds down, I find it hard to take down all of the decorations, pack away the memories, and let the cold of winter seep in where holiday lights used to be. But this year I think it will be a bit easier. After all, Jonathan and I are plotting to add a new tree or two to our 'Christmas forest', and Laura is already getting excited for next year. And I can always break out a Christmas song or two. After all, I know all of the words to those! :)

Horseplay 'R Us

2008-11-25T19:32:00.006-05:00

Almost every day here there will be some kind of chase or a good game of hide and seek going on when school work should be taking precedent. But good parents (and teachers) pick their battles so the choice to take a break is often allowed to play itself out. Lately it is quite common to see the boys chase Laura around the house from the kitchen to the dining and living rooms, through the entry and on to the family room only to start the whole thing all over again, laughing all the way. Or for two of them to team up to find the other one who keeps moving in order to avoid dection. However, there has also been an addition to the 'family' of horseplay. Literally.

Here's Matthew and Laura on the trail of Jonathan. You'll note Laura is resting more than the other two. However, the boys did get some rest in as well even though Laura had to be in the middle of it all.

Dr. Dobbs Revisited

2008-11-25T18:57:00.004-05:00

In the past few years I have discovered that there are few things more difficult than planning, and then giving the okay to proceed with surgery for your children. In your gut you know that it is necessary, and yet you wonder if you are really doing the right thing. You wonder whether the surgery will cause other problems in its wake or perhaps make things worse rather than better. And you wonder whether you've got the right surgeon sticking their surgical tools in places that will have a permanent impact on your child's life.

Way back almost five years ago now we gave permission for the first time to a surgeon who promised to make life better for Laura. At that time she had a g-tube put in to help her survive, and a nissen to keep her reflux from hurting her even more. Over the years she's had a large handful of additional surgeries, been put under anesthesia for a variety of tests, scans, and such, and had so many other tests while awake that I can't remember them all unless I review her medical records. Through it all Laura has been a trooper, shown her extreme patience, and has developed a very high tolerance for pain. On the other hand, Don and I have gotten more anxious and a bit more nauseous with each and every approval for surgery.

As we met with Dr. Dobbs to review her latest tests and reassess her feet he delivered news that we were dreading. We're down to just three options for straight feet: a posterior tendon transfer, an osteotomy on her heel bone, or a miracle from the Lord. Well, he didn't mention the last option but it is always on my mind. After reviewing the long term effects and the chances for success, we opted to try the posterior tendon transfer before resorting to the worst cast scenario of an osteotomy. Laura will be in Dr. Dobbs capable hands on December 8th. And I'll be sitting next to my Mom wishing I could cuddle up in her lap once again. After we are released from Shriners, we'll head home by December 9th for a week or two and then head back for a cast change. We understand she'll be in that cast for a month or so before finally being cast free - hopefully for good. She'll still have to use the FAB at night so we'll be ordering another pair of Mitchell shoes to go on our Dobbs bar.

While we are hauling her 34 lb plus cast laden body, I'll be reminded over and over again that she's thriving despite predictions to the contrary when she was born. I'll remember that she was God's long before she was mine and that He loves her even more than I do. I'll remember that he has a plan in all of this, a plan for good. And you can guarantee that I'll be wondering what it is even though I know I probably won't know for a long time, if ever. In the middle of all of it will be patient, precious Laura, hobbling around on her cast, laughing and playing as if nothing has changed. I learn so much from her. Perhaps this time I'll learn to be wait patiently, too.

Are Snow Shoes Really Necessary?

2008-11-21T15:38:00.004-05:00

There is little that brings more joy to our kids than the first few snowfalls of the season. They have yet to experience the overwhelming burden of shoveling again and again, and it is still warm enough per se to spend more than just a few minutes outside. Over the past few weeks we've had flurries, minor snow falls and even a few inches every now and then. And over the past 24 hours we've hit a snow bonanza. Yes, it's early. No, I'm not thrilled despite my love of all things Christmas. However, I have the pleasure of enjoying it from a much younger perspective, and that helps to soften the blow.

A few days ago as Jonathan watched the snow fall in squall bursts befitting the primary snowbelt instead of our normal secondary one, he reveled in the fun to come and told Laura of all the stuff they'd do when they finally got to go out and play in it. He even mentioned things we don't usually need here in the lower 48. Like snowshoes for instance. This meant that I had to look up snowshoes so we could figure out just why they worked. After all, I'm not one to pass up a teachable moment. But I failed to realize just how much of an impression it was making on Laura.

Before I realized it, Laura had gathered the flaps from the cardboard box that she'd had Daddy cut off the day before, and was sitting on the floor trying to figure out how to make her own snowshoes so she could go outside and play. Soon she asked Jonathan for help and before I knew it, masking tape was out and being used for makeshift 'laces'. While I don't think her version would last long, it is quite creative. Laura spent a long time 'walking' around her pretend snowfall, keeping herself on top of the snow, proving that she should be able to go outside and play because she "...won't get wet, Mom. Really I won't. I promise!" even though she has a cold.

As I type she's plotting to get outside as soon as Daddy comes home to enjoy the extra snow that fell today, and wondering where her snowshoes went. Somehow I think they are better left indoors.

Battling Daddy...

2008-11-21T15:24:00.003-05:00

I'm sure that it will come as no surprise to you that there are times when I feel like I've been a successful parent, and that Don and I are a great team. Matthew is becoming less of the child he has been, and is growing in to the man he will become. The joy I have as I watch him figure life out is one of the great pleasures in my life. But make no mistake. There are times when it is blatant that I am the mother of three children. And believe me when I say that sometimes I think I have four children in the house.

Here is an example of one of those days:

And where is Matthew you ask? He's off with Poppy. Working out and adding more muscle to his repertoire. I'm sure that if he were home, he'd have been right in the middle of it all. I imagine you are asking me what the big deal is with a few pillows and some balloons. And I'll be happy to answer you, just as soon as I get done praying for the lamps...

Pumpkin, Pumpkin, Where's MY Pumpkin?

2008-11-21T15:19:00.003-05:00

Daddy and I took Jonathan and Laura out in the days before Halloween to find the perfect pumpkin. And in the process we learned a few lessons. First, if you want the pick of the crop, don't wait until the last week. We also learned that there are a myraid of pumpkins shapes. And not all of them sit flat. Finally, we learned that no matter how few pumpkins there are to choose from, you can find one that is just meant for you.

Touring St. Louis

2008-11-21T14:12:00.005-05:00

Our trip to St. Louis at the end of September was a bit different than our normal drive by. Not only did we have the joy of Diane's company, but we stayed a whole day in between our 10 hour drives. After arriving on Sunday evening, we stopped to pick up something for dinner. Then we settled ourselves in to Nana's apartment knowing she was having a great time up north with Elizabeth but wishing she were home all the same. Monday morning we went to see Dr. Dobbs for a check up and prepared for the tests that Laura would be taking early Tuesday morning. Then we headed out to see what St. Louis had to offer.

It had been a long time since I'd been downtown, and even longer since I'd been to the arch. So we headed there praying that Jonathan wouldn't decide he was brave enough to take a ride to the top. He wasn't. :) But we did have a great time in the museum below the arch learning not only about it, but about it's status as "The Gateway to the West". There were wonderful exhibits detailing Lewis and Clark's exploration, some military items, native American history, details of the wagon trains headed west, and large pictures showing new arrivals coming by boat on the might Mississippi. I know Jonathan learned quite a bit that renforced some of his history and art lessons, and Laura was fascinated by teepees, covered wagons, and buffalo.

Here's Jonathan waving goodbye to us as he prepares to set off in his covered wagon.

Jonathan compared himself to the typical soldier back then. He declared them 'short'.

Here he is next to Lewis or Clark. I can't remember which...

Jonathan read some of the more interesting facts to Laura. Sometimes she actually listened!

Jonathan really got in to the spirit of it all and decided he needed to put some space between him and the buffalo.

And here he investigates the bear that used to roam that area.

It is hard to get a true picture of just how tall the arch really is,

but when you compare the picture of the arch with this picture of the little windows in the observation area, you begin to get the picture. The arch stands 630 feet in the air. And it sways in the wind. Really. Kind of takes your breath away when you are up there blowing in the breeze. I chose not to experience that this trip...

When you are standing outside the arch, there are huge steps that lead down to the Mississippi River. And the bridge we used to cross each time we came to town was just down the way.

We also stopped in at the renovated train station to visit shops and see some of the historic artifacts there, too. I was amused at the prices on the menu, and amazed at quality of the dishes, and the apparent customer service back then. The beautiful architecture they have restored, the stained glass windows, and the colorful tile work showed some of the pride St. Louis has in its history. They've done a beautiful job there. I hope that it revives once again as the economy strengthens in the coming years.

They also had a replica of a caboose at the train station, and Laura just had to explore it. :)

We had several other adventures on our trip as well. Mom explored the neighborhood where she spent some of her childhood, and we ventured in to several areas we'd never been to before in search of one of only three Wendy's in St. Louis. Imagine our surprise when we discovered it was closed. We ate ice cream at Ted Drewes, drove by the botanical gardens, and enjoyed some of the spirit of St. Louis and the efforts to maintain its history in some of the beautiful older buildings. When we finally headed home once again on Tuesday, loopy Laura (the anesthesia kept her a bit off kilter for several hours), Diane, Jonathan, Mom and I knew we'd be back soon. And Nana will be waiting.

The Princess and The Pirate

2008-11-21T13:47:00.003-05:00

The annual trick or treat night is iffy here. Or at least it used to be. The boys would sometimes decide that they were just too old (Matthew really is!), or that this year they felt they shouldn't go out because of the spiritual 'feeling' of the season, or just because they didn't want to venture out in to the cold. But every year come Oct 31st, those young enough to go are always dressed and ready at the appointed time.

This year there was no consideration allowed. It was a given that we would go. Period. Princess Laura planned it for months. She knew what she wanted to be and she knew what she was going to wear. And for weeks she collected treasures as she came across them because she thought she'd want to wear them with her costume. Tiaras, necklaces, bracelets, earrings, magic wands, and even fairy wings were all considered at one time or another. But in the end the tiara was the only accessory she chose to include in her outfit.

Jonathan remained unsure of his trick or treat status until the final week. It was then that he learned he could hit the neighborhood with a new friend down the street. There was no question. He was going. But what could he wear? I led him downstairs to the costume boxes in storage. They hold many treasures - furry bunny suits, a fuzzy duck, mexican attire, ladybug jackets, baseball pants, and a pirate costume collected for Matthew's 5th birthday party and proudly worn by Poppy as he dared those attending to 'walk the plank'. I tried to encourage the baseball outfit as it would give him the best opportunity for warmth, but he chose the pirate costume. But being Jonathan, he couldn't just go as a normal pirate. He needed to cap it off with his own little touch.

I smiled as I sent off my two trick or treaters, Daddy in tow. They would spend almost the full two hours out, collecting candy we didn't need, laughing with friends, and touching base with neighbors as they traveled from house to house. Matthew and I stayed home, talked together, and passed out candy. We couldn't have asked for a better evening. And Laura is already planning for next year.

I'm Dreaming Tonight...

2008-09-27T16:03:00.002-04:00

Christmas 2007

It seems I've gone and done it again. Not in an 'oops' kind of way. More in a 'Wow!' kind of way. Like the time I realized that my genes were alive and well in my daughter when she was mesmerized by her first real view of clowns in action. All of the clowns I decided to keep have been safely packed away for years and I've never shared that part of my life with my children. But somehow Laura holds that same fascination. What a joy it was to watch her face as she saw her first real clowns performing on a Discovery program! I think the circus is in our future soon. Or the time that Matthew said something in the same tone of voice using the same mannerisms as my brother did when he was a teenager. I had to take a double take to be sure I wasn't back in time! Apparently some 'nature' lives on in all of our children no matter what the 'nurture'.

So that brings us to today's discovery. Jonathan, Laura and I were home cleaning, quick tidying, and actually dusting *gasp* when Jonathan says out of the blue "Mom, Let's have a lot of Christmas trees this year. And let's make them theme trees. You know, like a 'Game Tree' using our game pieces. And we could spread the boxes underneath like they are presents. Or a toy tree where we could hang all of our little toys on it. Know what I mean, Mom?" Uhhhh... YES! I know exactly what he means. I'd love to do a beach themed tree this year. Even if it is only a small one. Four feet or less. And I'd love to do a gingerbread themed tree in the kitchen, and a snowman themed tree on the steps with the snow family we usually put there. And several others. Yes, I know exactly what he means. He's got the bug! He loves Christmas, too. Not just because of the presents. But because our house is transformed from the normal to something wonderful. And the time spent enjoying it can't be traded for anything.

But what I didn't know, and couldn't figure out, is where the comment came from in the first place. Oh, I'll admit that I was playing Christmas music while we cleaned today. I love Christmas music and I know he does, too. But we weren't talking about Christmas in any way. And Jonathan knows that Daddy had to be talked in to the two trees we put up last year so they'd match in the bow windows on the front of the house. So more trees??? YES! I have a partner in Christmas planning!!! His wife will just love me, don't you think? :)

After some chatting about trees, we decided we'd start small this year and see what we could use that we already have or can get from freecycle/garage sales and thrifting. And of course we'll watch sales and so on. And we'll do more with the smaller trees we already have. And wreaths... we could do themed wreaths, too. I already have a small collection of things for them going downstairs. Oh I just can't wait to get started!

Ah, Christmas! As the song says "I'm dreaming tonight of a place even more than I usually do". And that place is sitting in front of the lit Christmas tree with the fire going, cuddled up with the family, listening to Christmas music, playing a down and dirty game of Pit or Pass The Pig. Yep, It would be a perfect evening! :)

Little Did We Realize...

2008-09-25T20:06:00.003-04:00

Tonight was a quiet night at home. The 'men' of the house, who are periodically known around here as "Muscle", were off helping Dad move Laura's play house over in order to make room for his new shed in the back yard. Well, it might be more like a small barn in these here parts, but we'll stick with shed since we know what a real barn is. Anyway with Don and Matthew gone, Laura, Jonathan, and I kept ourselves busy. Jonathan was doing his best to ignore the end of his history assignment he didn't want to finish by playing computer games, Laura was playing with her babies, and I was sorting and cleaning out files on the computer as I'm almost out of room. Apparently it is one of the negative side effects to owning a digital camera. All was quiet on the homefront.

And then from the far reaches of the family room I hear "I wan to pay on my caputer." I quietly ignored it thinking she'd get sidetracked as I knew we didn't have hers plugged in to the internet yet. The router was on our to do list but hadn't filtered to the top yet so she was not attached to surfability. After a moment or two I heard it again. "I wan to pay on my caputer!" Yes, it was a big more firm this time. I figured I'd wait her out one more time.

Pretty soon I was rewarded - or not as you will see - by the growing insistence in her voice. Only this time she said "I NEED to get on da INDERNET!" While I can totally relate to her feelings of need, I knew she didn't have email quite yet so I was a bit amused. I realize when she learns to read I'll be dealing with her request for her own email, but until then I think I've got the upper hand. However, she didn't see it my way. The insistence in the voice rose once again. As she walked in to the living room she said "Mom! I NEED to get on da INDERNET! Now MOM! I NEED PBSKIDS!"

Yeah, I had to hold back the laughter, too. Somehow I managed. I calmly went with her in to the family room, explained that Daddy needed a new router so she could get on the internet. and she just needed to be patient. Meanwhile I told her I could put another game on her computer for her to play. Very brightly she said "So I can play PBSKIDS anyways???" Uhhh, no. But soon. I promise. She declined and followed me back in to the living room and promptly asked Jonathan to play something on his computer with her. They are playing happily as I type.

As I considered the fact that my four year old daughter understands so much about technology I realized she probably had no choice. After all, we started her out pretty early...

Maybe we rushed it just a bit. :)

On The Road Again...

2008-09-24T11:40:00.003-04:00

This weekend we once again head out to see Dr. Dobbs. However, this visit is a bit different. Not only will we be seeing Dr. Dobbs for a check, we'll also be doing an 'H&P' (history and physical in medical terms) and then having a nerve study done to confirm what Dr. Dobbs believes is nerve damage that is preventing her clubfoot from maintaining correction. Since this test checks for nerves, they believe it best that she be put to sleep for the process as Laura isn't exceedingly tolerant of some medical procedures. Especially those that cause some pain. Gee, who would have guessed?

Once we know the outcome of the testing we'll know what surgery, if any, she'll need. I'm expecting some but I'm not fully aware yet of all of our options. We're expecting the test results to give us that information. And we'll also know what additional casting might be needed to recorrect her foot. I feel somewhat like this may be the beginning of the end. But I've felt that way before and we are still on the journey so I'll reserve that until a later date.

I've often wondered why God hasn't fixed this. Why he hasn't just reached down and moved her bone back where it belongs or readjusted her fat pad so she's walking more normally. And I know that if she were a 'normal' clubfoot child we'd be done with the shoes, the regular appts and the constant wondering. We'd be done. But that isn't our reality. So I'll just keep on going through doors the Lord opens, doing what needs to be done and praying that the Lord's will would come to fruition in His time. And I think that is the hardest thing in all of this. Not knowing the outcome but moving ahead anyway.

Perhaps that is the bigger picture for me, and what I'm learning through all of this. Trusting the Lord. Following the Lord. Doing what I know is right even when it is the hard thing to do. Trusting. Totally trusting. I think it is one of the hardest things I'll ever do. And I know it is the right thing. I've tried the 'on my own' thing. Didn't get me very far. So here we are. Headed out on the road again. Another St. Louis drive by! May the Lord protect us, provide for us and give Dr. Dobbs wisdom as we move forward in our journey.

Letting Go

2008-09-12T06:30:00.002-04:00

I think I've discovered a wrinkle in this 'parenting teens' thing. A rather big one I didn't expect. After all, we are programmed from their conception (and possibly before) to expect teenagers to reject the maturation process, to cling to childish ways, and to attempt to pull things over on us no matter how well we parent - or don't as the case may be. But some children apparently resist such expected behaviors - it could be that they've heard something akin to "Sorry, the fact that you are a teenager is no excuse" for several years. Or maybe it is because those who are wise enough to skip the 'expected' route realized at an early age that responsibility was the key that opened privileged doors. Or maybe I'm just blessed. But apparently I wasn't prepared.

I was up early this morning. I'd gotten 6 hours of straight sleep. Yes, I said 6 hours. Uninterrupted. Solid. Blessed sleep. So by the time the rain woke me up at 4:30, I was good to go. I popped in some laundry (a great activity for those insomniac nights I'm told), perused the news to see what the talking heads were saying about Sarah Palin's interview with Charlie Gibson last night, checked the weather for Matthew's YFC event at the stadium with the Indians tomorrow, and renewed the joys of a cold gulp of caffeinated energy. And then I sat down to see how Matthew was doing in his classes. He has classes with BOSS four days a week this year, and he's entered the wonderful world of High School so life is a bit more demanding for him.

As I perused his assignments and grades, I noted that he had one due today that he had yet to turn in but I figured he'd get to it before classes this morning. I flipped to the grades page. In the first class he's making an A - 100%. Another class has him at 95% - still an A. Not bad. He's doing what he is capable of doing. And then I flipped to his third class. And I note a big fat "0" grade. As in nothing. No points. Nada. *sigh* My mind begins to turn to his activities on the day it was assigned and the following day when it was due. Yes, he indeed had time to finish the assignment. How dare he not do something that was due??? My parent blood began to boil. I never made it through the rest of his classes.

My mind quickly flipped through my options, checked the time and figured 6:15 was a great time to wake him up. After all, we needed to talk. I quietly snuck (is that a word?)in to his room, hoping that Jonathan and Laura would stay asleep for several more hours. As soon as I sat down, he rolled over and moaned "what?" as if he were expecting something bad had happened. In my mind I quickly thought "Oh Honey. You have NO idea..." and then took a quick, calming breath before saying "Did you know that you have an assignment due today that you haven't turned in yet?" He moans and says "I did it. I just didn't turn it in yet." I relaxed knowing he did this a lot last year. He'd do everything and then scan and submit it the following day. I was willing to let that go until I heard him say "At least I think I did..." I suggested he needed to get up and check that because he still had time to do it if he didn't.

Then I took a deep breath and said "Do you know that there is an assignment that was due Tuesday worth 15 points and you have 0? As in NO POINTS! How could you miss an assignment? Here I thought you were growing up and I didn't need to check your assignments regularly and I guess I was wrong." (Yeah, I should have stopped after the first sentence but my brain was elsewhere at that moment) There is a pause as he digests my tirade before he calmly says "I did it Mom. I turned it in." My response is quick and without thought. "Oh really? It says that you got zero points. Nothing. As if you didn't even try it. What was the assignment about?" He lifts up his head, turns to me and asks if that is the assignment that was to be done in complete sentences. I nod in the affirmative. He flops back on his pillow and says "Mom. I did it. He just hasn't graded it yet. It says zero because the computer couldn't analyze our sentences and he has to review each submission. I guess he hasn't gotten to it yet." Then, as if to punctuate his proof positive that I've lost my Mother Mind, he tightens his stomach muscles and blasts out an rear-exit exclamation in true male fashion. *sigh*

I quickly realize I've jumped the gun. I've made assumptions that were untrue. I have doubted him when he has done just what he was supposed to do. I really don't need to check up on him regularly. He's growing up. My baby is growing up. In an effort to ease the tension before I apologize I start to make a fuss about his final, odiferous action. When we are both smiling once again I apologize and tell him I'm happy that I was wrong and I'm proud of how well he's handling high school and the transition to the increased work load. Then I cajole him in to getting up 30 minutes early in order to prevent the alarm from waking everyone up and head downstairs.

When I get to the bottom of the steps I stop, wrap my arms around myself and silently thank the Lord that my son is growing up. He's turning in to what I pray will be a strong man of God. With integrity and a positive attitude. I realize I need to change my way of handling him. I need to treat him more like the person he is becoming and not the person he was. And I thank the Lord that I have that opportunity. Here. At home. Every day. All day. Where I get to enjoy his wonderfully developing personality with warmth and humor much of the time.

And then I remember that yes, I get to spend all day, every day with this wonderful person. Even if he spends far too much time spitting out puns... I guess there's a downside to everything, eh? :)

It Can't Be!!!

2008-09-11T15:41:00.003-04:00

It seems that there are many effects to working out, specifically with weights and so on. For the past year, Matthew and my Dad have gone three days a week to work out at the gym. They both have a routine and they move from machine to machine, strengthening their muscles and bonding at the same time. And in true family fashion, Dad not only shares his knowledge and wisdom with my growing son, but throws in some puns along the way which is making life around here ever more interesting. How many other families spend time making up jokes with wordplay?? Yeah, I didn't think so. And as a friend so wisely said today, the Lord says we are to be a "peculiar people". I guess we take that very seriously around here.

Anyway, as my very hormonally laden teenager headed upstairs for a much needed shower today, it seems he decided to check his weight. Why? Who knows. I check it far too often for my enjoyment. Apparently he's smarter than I am. For a few moments all is quiet. Then from upstairs I hear "190!!! 190!!??!!?? I can't weigh 190!!!! It Can't be!!!! came screaming down to greet me.

I must admit I had several reactions. The first was to smile. Just what does he think all of that weight-lifting and working out is doing? Yeah, his initial motivation might have been to get a tighter bucket so I'd hurt my hand when I whacked it as I walked by instead of making his bucket sting, but since then he's realized the time with Poppy is what it is really all about. Well that, and those muscles he's so diligently crafting. I guess it is time he learns that muscle weighs more than fat.

But my second reaction is the one that I hope will add to my motivation to be healthier. I'd love to weigh 190. Yes, really. How awesome it would be to weigh less than my teen son. After all, he's taller than I am. He's obviously stronger than I am. And he isn't done growing or working out yet. So there you have it. Another motivator to lose weight and get healthy. I think I need to make a list. And then blow it up along with a few choice, not-so-flattering pictures from our beach week, and post them in the pantry and the frig. Maybe that, along with a few scriptures, will do it. Just think... I won't be the heaviest one in the family any longer. Wouldn't that be awesome?!?!?! I'll let you know how it goes.

By George, I Think She's Got It!

2008-09-08T13:07:00.004-04:00

Yes, indeed. I do believe she's actually got it. Down pat, even. Or maybe I should have said 'dry pat, even'. Why? Because she's done it. She's actually done it. Our "Potty Princess" really is, finally, a true, full-fledged, verifiable Potty Princess. Not because she wants to, mind you. But she has done it in spite of herself.

Almost every morning she wakes up with dry pull ups. And after doing her thing, she will find a pink pair of big girl panties and put them on. Well, perhaps after a bit of 'naked baby' running just because she can. :) Our big girl is finally big in yet another sense of the word. And I couldn't be happier. But I am considering buying stock in Potty Toppers...

Influence 'R Us

2008-08-30T16:11:00.002-04:00

I realize that there are many families who have gone before me. Many have raised a daughter after having a house full of testosterone. It is so very common. I just don't know any up close and personal. Oh, I have several friends who have one son for instance, and then a daughter or two. And I have friends who have a few older sons and a younger daughter, but they also have an older daughter or two to help balance that out. Not here. Nope. We're exploring the joys of a daughter who idolizes her brothers. And it is a testament to God's nature more than the nurture she receives from her brothers that she prefers dolls to guns, and Care Bears and stuffed 'My Little Ponies' to Star Wars and lego war sets.

This morning the whole realization that she needs an older female example now and then came blasting, literally, through to me once again. Laura was rough housing with the boys. You know, the "let's have a good time and run through the house playing hide and seek and so on while we should be picking up and getting the house cleaned" thing. As a lull came in order for them to catch their breath, Laura was standing over Matthew, who was laying prone on the floor on his belly, waiting for him to get up so she could chase him. However, Matthew relaxed just a bit too much and it seems a little fluff was released. Okay, a not so little fluff was released. It echoed even. And then just a second or two later I heard the pitter patter of little feet retreating and a very sweet voice yelling "RUN FOR YOUR WIFE!!! RUN FOR YOUR WIFE!!!" And then a very quiet male 'excuse me' amidst the rolling laughter.

*sigh* Yes, she's being raised with teenage boys. Somehow I have to think God's preparing her for something. At least I hope so. After all, why let her knowledge of boys go to waste??? LOL

And so it goes.

Saying Goodbye to Summer

2008-08-29T17:32:00.005-04:00

On the boardwalk in Wildwood

As I wrote the last post, I had this deep desire to revisit our days at the beach. It was such a peaceful time. Despite the whole bathroom situation. :) So here are some more pictures of our time at the beach. Can't you just smell the ocean?

Jonathan spent a lot of time searching for shells. Especially the elusive, unoccupied whelk. I believe this was one of his first...

And this was Matthew's first.

And Jonathan found more.

On the day that we headed down to Sunset Beach, we came home by way of the Cape May Lighthouse park. This is part of what is left of some military bunkers and so on. Initially the Seth, Mackenzie, Jarryd, Mikayla, Jonathan and Matthew were not expecting the spray.

But for this picture they knew it was coming and the girls knew it wouldn't get them wet.

Matthew really loved this beach.

Matthew, Uncle Scott and Jonathan explored the old military bunkers.

And the boys tried to dig trenches but the ocean kept ruining all of their hard work.

We spent some time in Cape May strolling the shops. Laura, Jonathan and Uncle Scott found a fountain.

And after we were done, Laura and Kenz found a place to rest back at Scott and Brenda's rental.

I had to include this photo. It is of Scott and Brenda's mirror as we crossed the access bridge over the sound approaching Stone Harbor. In it you can see our van, complete with clam shell on the top, and you can also see Brenda taking the photo. Cracked us up!

Back in Stone Harbor, the boys found one of the few Horseshoe crabs we found this year. They are big suckers. And I mean big! Very slow moving. Very scarce.

And finally, the boys after conquering another day at the beach. The sun is setting and we must all head back. Oh how I wish I were on that beach again. Just for a few more days!!!
At least we have next year.

Summer Sunshine

2008-08-29T14:08:00.008-04:00

Remember this? "I'm walking on sunshine, woo - oh, I'm walking on sunshine, woo - oh, I'm walking on sunshine, woo - oh, and don't it feel good!!" Or how about John Denver singing "Sunshine on my shoulder makes me happy. Sunshine in my eyes can make me cry. Sunshine on the water looks so lovely... " Or even "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away." Ah yes. Sunshine. We have enjoyed its warm fingers and colorful joy much of the summer. After all, we haven't had much rain so the skies have been wonderfully blue and full of sunshine for awhile now. And then there was our wonderful trip back to the beach. But all good things must come to an end. Including our summer. And even though I'll miss it, we can remember the good times by strolling through some pictures.

I know it has been a long time since there have been new pictures and stories of the life and times of the troops, so I'll try to make it up to you. Here are a few of the things we did this summer besides the beach.

As usual, we had picnics on the deck at Mom and Dad's. Senta attends now and then, and seemed to enjoy the attention Jonathan lavishes on him. Senta's a wonderful dog. Very calm and quite well-behaved.

At picnics, it is common for Dad to allow the boys to light the stuff piled in the fire pit and make roast marshmallows or make s'mores. Matthew and Seth are our family fire makers. Maybe they enjoy it just a little too much!

Laura spent the summer wearing her patch for three or more hours a day and it seem to be helping. We won't go for a check up until the first week of October, but her 20/2100 eye seems to be seeing things better as we give her quick checks every now and then. I pray the Lord takes care of this as he's done with so many of her other issues.

Mom and Dad took the kids to a Museum where there were some wonderful outdoor things to explore as well. Here Poppy is doing his best to give them all a great ride - much to the surprise of his muscles! He pulled something doing this and sported a large bruise for weeks. He's such a good Grandpa. :)

These are the slides they had. You'll note that it was never an option to do the smaller slide, even for Laura. After going down the Jonathan...

And then Matthew...

And watching Poppy do it all by himself...

She braved the slide herself! Needless to say, she loved it.

Here's Jonathan making a run for it on his own, too. Note Laura walking back towards the ladder for another round on her own, carrying her sack as she goes!

Matthew decided to try 'surfing' the slide and did it quite easily. Until he saw the sign that said you couldn't do that. So back to the bum he went.

The boys also spent several mornings before the rest of the street woke up learning the physics involved in flying little airplanes. Here Matthew is coaching Jonathan in order to get the best 'lift' that he can get.

The happy pilots.

And Laura vying for attention as she was feeling left out with all of the pictures I was taking of the boys. Poor thing. Do you think she has a future in modeling? LOL

She's so grown up, isn't she? Where did my baby go???

As the school year starts up once again I will miss the sunshine. But I look forward to more adventures as we explore new avenues in our history, preschool with Laura and the joys of high school. And secretly, I really am glad we're back on some sort of schedule once again!!! Shhhhhh!!! Don't tell the boys. I think I'll let them figure that out for themselves.

Graduation Is So Sweet. Drum Roll, Please!

2008-07-03T13:56:00.003-04:00

The household rose early today. Not because we wanted to, mind you. It was because we had an 8 AM appt. with Laura's ENT and I felt I needed to leave early to deal with rush hour traffic and construction. And as the moments ticked down before we left my stomach got more and more butterflies. What would this visit bring? Would we have to schedule surgery to remove the stubborn tube that was put in long ago and didn't come out on its own within the accepted time frame? Couldn't she just let them pull it out at the office? Would she scream bloody murder again or would she be a bit more grown up about it all?

When we arrived, on time mind you, Laura's immediate need was to use the restroom. It was then I realized she shared my butterflies and knew that this wasn't Dr. Dobbs or her Ped. There would be no toys or tattoos. Just pain and frustration on her part. And neither of us were looking forward to it.

When we finally got to see the ENT, he peaked in to her ears, and then smiled a big smile (he does this very well) and said "I think her tube is out and laying in the ear canal" I didn't believe him so he had to repeat it for me. And then he plucked the sucker out just to prove he was right. And Laura only made a small whimper. She was so brave. And she was tube free! No need for surgery. No need for more tubes. She's done. The Lord did it again.

As he finished up the visit he looked at me and said "Well, you've graduated. You don't need to come back to see me unless another problem develops." I, very unprofessionally, high-fived him and we left with lots of giggles, laughter and two Nemo stickers. While we like our ENT very much and appreciate him for saving her life, it didn't bother me one bit that we just might have seen the last of him.

She graduated. It is just one more way that she's growing up. And I couldn't be more proud of her.

Passionate About Feet!

2008-07-02T10:09:00.002-04:00

Okay, okay. I'm not talking just any feet. I'm talking about clubfeet. Ones that need the correct treatment in order to walk down that aisle someday with pain-free, straight feet. I've learned over the years that those who become well versed in whatever disease, disability, or birth defect one might have and learn to successfully treat it without invasive procedures successfully become virtual zealots, encouraging other parents to follow in their path. I think I've finally gone over the clubfoot edge. And I think that's a good thing.

For several years I've been a part of the nosurgery4clubfoot yahoo group. It is made up of dedicated Moms who are spreading the word, those in the midst of treatment, and those looking for answers for their unborn child or perhaps one who is being adopted or has relapsed at an older age. Because of that group, I have closer communication with some of the dedicated, experienced Moms and I try to do my part to help when I can.

That help has been in waves. Sometimes we are concentrating so hard on what is best for Laura, it is hard to see what might be best for others. I've always been glad that the other experienced Moms were so dedicated that they could help families, and I've looked forward to the day when I could relax and feel just as passionate as they do. I think my time has come.

Last week I came across a blog written by a Mom who has a daughter with clubfeet. I read a few posts and felt that I needed to do something to help them get on the right track. A lot of Ortho Specialists claim that they are doing the Ponseti Method to correct clubfeet, but sadly they aren't. They might have been trained by him, they might have read his books and used his handbook, and they might have a great reputation as being the best in their area, but they deviate because they think they know more than 50 years of research shows. They become lax and either increase the chances of doing something wrong to a child's foot, or they greatly increase the chances of a relapse. Big Time.

So I began praying for this family. Hoping and praying is more like it. And I realized I'd just crossed the line in to the passionate, dedicated clubfoot Mom. It amused me and caused some anguish at the same time. What would become of me? Would I turn out to be one of those Moms who didn't listen and just tried to shove the correct Ponseti method down other parents throats? Would I get a cheerleaders outfit and do my thing from the sidelines? Would I think of nothing but clubfeet???

No. I don't think so. My Mom shares with me periodically about how great it is that we have contact with so many people through this wonderful technological medium and she is constantly amazed at what can happen through email and now blogs. So I figure I won't change much on the outside. I'll just keep better track, develop simple, calm answers to questions parents post and do my best to see that they are getting the best care they can for their children. And I'll pray a lot more for families I don't even know. I'll be praying that they have ears to hear and a heart that is open to doing something different if it means their child will have greater success with their feet. I'll be praying that they will be willing to do what needs done no matter how far they have to drive or how many phone calls they'll have to make to their insurance company as a result. And I'll be praying for Dr. Ponseti. He is a wonderful, calm, healthy 94 and we need him around for a few more years. But he also needs the Lord. I'll also be praying for Dr. Dobbs. He's seeing more and more patients who need help after someone else has had their hands on those precious feet and he needs wisdom as he deals with more and more unusual cases.

Prayer. Who knew it would be a part of experienced, dedicated, zealous clubfoot parents trying to spread the word. I guess I should have known all along. Certainly Laura has had her share of prayers said over her from day one. And look at her. Who would ever know that she was supposed to be long gone by now. Prayer works. And along with Dr. Ponseti and Dr. Dobbs, who knows what might come if it? I smile when I realize I know. And I hope that I can pass on that legacy to Laura someday.

Girls, Caillou and Tools

2008-06-27T11:11:00.003-04:00

A part of my childhood is revisited daily in my household. A part I only remember through stories from my parents, but is so intimately familiar that I feel as though I live it every day. Because I do.

Each morning and evening, I set Laura up on the edge of our bed and brush out her long hair. She LOVES the hair. HATES the brushing. She cries at the slightest pull and behaves much like I'm torturing her so I've learned to ignore it. I'm sure my Mom got to the same place with me resulting in my first hair cut at age eight where I went from long, long hair to a pixie in one visit to the beauty shop. Needless to say, I don't have a fondness for them to this day.

Anyway, to avert her attention while brushing out tangles we often employ either a bigger brother to play with her, singing with Mommy, or we turn on Caillou on who resides in the on demand feature of our cable programming. I love on demand. It is a partner with me in creating a calm, relatively scream-free atmosphere just before bed. Of course Laura is able to get herself together enough these days to tell me what it is that she wants me to do with her hair, but that is a whole different discussion.

Last night as I was brushing out her hair after her bath and wondering what I was going to do with it for the night, Caillou was learning how to problem solve and use tools. It prompted this conversation:

Laura: Mommy, I want some tools.
Me: Oh? What kind of tools?
Laura: Pink tools. *I work hard here to not snicker out loud*
Me: Of course. What kind of pink tools.
Laura: I need a wrench (pronounced wench), a hammer and what is that other thing called? The long thing?
Me: A screwdriver?
Laura: Yes, a screwdriver, that's it! I want a pink wrench, a hammer, and a screwdriver. Just pretend, Mommy.
Me: Of course.

There is a pause in the conversation as she watches more of Caillou. Then she adds:

Laura: I want one of those things in pink, too. A tool box. Like Caillou's with a handle that is pink and everything.
Me: But Caillou's isn't pink. It is blue.
Laura: I know, I know Mommy. But I want a pink on to go with my wrench, hammer and screwdriver!
Me: Of course.
Laura: So get them, okay? Then I can help you fix all sorts of things around the house after the boys break them.

Laughing out loud at this point is inevitable. I can't help it. She has such a practical view of life, doesn't she?

And so it goes here on the homestead. :)

Doctor, Doctor, Give Me The News

2008-06-19T14:09:00.002-04:00

Sometimes it seems that some of the most interesting times of our lives are destined to repeat themselves. While this isn't all that bad when the interesting times were great ones, it can be frustrating when those times were ones you'd rather leave far behind you. And I mean far, far behind you. As in never have to look back, and never have to deal with it again, either. Ah, if only it were that easy peasy.

Yes, you read that right. Easy Peasy. If you've been reading the blog for awhile you'll remember that those cute little words were spoken by our wise, very comical Dr. Stone last fall. The very one who told me that removing a toe nail would be indeed 'easy peasy' and I had nothing to worry about. As it turned out, easy peasy wasn't exactly how I'd describe it but then I was on the receiving end and he was just doing the fun part. Well, at least from his perspective. So of course it was easy peasy. For him!

Anyway, it seems I am enjoying the same infection that attacked last year and we're working on getting rid of it with antibiotics. I'd rather avoid the whole toenail removal thing. And to that end, he took my very swollen toe, lanced it - can you say OUCH! - and the stuck a q-tip thingy in there to get a 'sample' to grow so he knew what we were dealing with. Uh yeah. Fun, that. NOT. And then, just to top off the event, he squeezed the sucker just for good measure. At this point I'm beginning to wish that the examination table were a bit lower so my other foot could make contact with something but I restrained. Wonderful patient that I am.

When he finally finished his dastardly deeds, he lead me back to his office to finish up. I'm busy being thankful that I wore sandals so my throbbing toe would not be shoved into a shoe, when the Good Doctor pulls one of the sneakiest, apparently well-thought-out tricks yet. He grabs the blood pressure cuff and shoves it on my arm. Talk about playing dirty pool...

Now I'm the first to admit my bp is a bit high, but it is not like I'm going to have a heart attack any day now. At least, as Dr. Stone assures me, not on his watch. So what is the big deal? At home, just the night before it was 134/84 - a great improvement over the previous measurement. And a wonderful testament to the relaxation brought about by a week at the beach. But just telling him that wasn't good enough. Oh no. He waited until after he ransacked my poor toe before he takes his reading. Imagine my surprise when it read 134/103. Yes, that was 103. *sigh*

He sends me off with a script for an antibiotic and a diuretic to help my blood pressure. A diuretic. Translation: You get a lot of time to ponder what new paint and/or wallpaper you want to use in every bathroom in the house. We have three. I'm intimately aware of all of their foibles as I've visited them so often in the past two days that I'm going to have to get my own bronzed statue commemorating the throne soon as I'm declared the "Most Frequent Visitor in 2008". Or at least replace the carpeting and tile in each one as they are wearing out at an ever increasing rate. And we aren't even done with the year, yet.

Ah, the Good Doctor.

But today, after just two days on the medication, I stopped taking it. Its effect on me, aside from the obvious, meant I was extremely nauseous and dizzy. Can't live like that. Give me fat feet from methyldopa any day over that. After all, I'm a good patient. Obedient. Really. I am. Most of the time.

So my trips to the our three water closets has lessened somewhat, and I'm wondering what he'll do to me next. Perhaps we can just wait a bit before starting something else. After all, here at home my bp was acceptable last night. Really it was. I have witnesses.

And so it goes...

Princess of the Potty

2008-06-19T11:40:00.002-04:00

It is wonderful to be able to report that our Princess of the Potty is doing quite well at it and is actually wearing big girl undies during the day. YEAH for Laura! And while her foray in to pottying has had its difficulties, not to mention its delayed start, it has also provided some entertainment for us.

As we were travelling home from Stone Harbor, we were pushing the last leg of our journey when from the back comes a voice willing itself to be heard over the din of adult chatter, car noises and air conditioning. It said "Mommy I need to go potty." When no response was forthcoming, she went on to share a litany of pleas to get us to stop. But the one that finally brought a response from an adult, other than the advice to hold it awhile longer, was her plaintive plea "Pwease Mommy. Find a pee store, Mommy. I've got to go potty."

Ah, the wisdom of a four year old. :)

49 Years Filled With Love

2008-06-18T11:43:00.003-04:00

While we were on vacation, my parents celebrated their 49th wedding anniversary. Forty-nine years. Married. Together. And to think that it started when they were very young and well, you know the rest. They have loved me, inspired me, corrected me, guided me, and walked beside me. They have accomplished much in their married lives, but the really cool thing about it all is that they are still married 49 years later, and still loving each other.

Jonathan made a special anniversary card for them in the sand. He may not realize it yet but because they've been married for so long and had such an influence on his life, he will be a better husband when he finally finds the one the Lord has for him. Meanwhile, he will keep it simple and honor his Honey and Poppy. A statement he made up himself and a heart he made for them to express his love for his grandparents. Emphasis on Grand. They are indeed grand. To him, to Matthew, to Laura, and to Don and I. And so Jonathan made his tribute from the heart. I wonder what he'll do next year.

Sunset Beach

2008-06-18T11:17:00.004-04:00

In Cape May, there is an attraction that, miraculously, doesn't include sand. At Sunset Beach, the beach is covered with ocean tumbled rock, many from quartz, and you don't shell there. You look for Cape May Diamonds instead. We visited for a few hours and spent our fair share of time searching for our own diamonds in the rough. First, Poppy gave instructions and then they went their own way, digging down to find what someone else might have missed.

There is a bit of history there as well. Out in the ocean you can see the remnants of one of only 12 experimental concrete ships. Yes, you read that right. Concrete. Ship. Made to float... But I digress. Apparently, this one was purchased on order to make a reef somewhere else but was pulled from its mooring and washed up towards Sunset Beach. No one was able to pull it out at that time so it has remained right where it landed, slowly wearing away in the waves. As you can see, it doesn't really look like a ship now, but it still makes one wonder just how the navy thought a concrete ship was a good idea.

As we retreated from the beach to visit the shops before moving on to the Cape May Lighthouse, Kayla and Jarryd came up. Both, obviously holding a small cache of Cape May Diamonds in their hands, looked at me and said "Now what? What do we do with them?" That is a question, isn't it? Now what? Hmmm... I shared that my Dad had a jar full of them at home, collected over many visits here. And that others took the bigger ones and made jewelry out of them - they could see the outcome in one of the shops. Or they could decided what else they might want to do with them. But for me, half of the fun is finding them and then knowing that when you look at them, they are a reminder of the peaceful day spent collecting them. I guess it is an age thing. :)

Stone Harbor

2008-06-18T10:11:00.008-04:00

Stone Harbor. The words bring to mind seagulls gliding on the wind, beautiful sunsets, long walks on the beach, shelling, and the constant sound of the waves coming and going over the sand where we just walked. These were sounds we knew very well 12 years ago and that I was able to share with Don on our honeymoon 6 years ago, but last week I took the time to realize just how much I love Stone Harbor. I think everyone felt the same way by the time the week ended. Matthew and Jonathan were there for the first time and they now know why we love it so much there.

On Saturday we started our journey bright and early, but not as early as we intended. Doesn't that always happen? My Mom and Dad, our family, and my Sister-In-Law all climbed into Dad's Astro and off we went. We expected a 10 hour journey with a lot of stops for our newly peeing-in-the-potty princess, but made it in 8.5 hours with only two stops. As we sailed down the Garden State Parkway on the last leg of our journey, the smells of the ocean greeted us every once in awhile and only heightened our desire to get our feet in the sand.

Unloading the car was quite easy but we realized just how much we'd brought as Dad pulled stuff out of every nook and cranny he had in the car. The car top carrier was left for last and since we didn't have a ladder, Jonathan went up on top to unload. We shoved everything in the house, gathered together and headed down to the beach.

Here's our first taste of the ocean. You will note that the boys didn't waste any time getting down to the water.

The first few days there were very hot and humid so the boys tried to cool off in the 60 some odd degree water but it was just toooooo cold. However, down at the point of the island, there is a much calmer beach where tide pools are common and shells are plentiful. So we headed there. Here are some pictures from those adventure. You'll note that almost always, heads are bent looking down either trying to find shells or checking out something that they found while looking for that elusive uninhabited whelk.

Playing in the tide pools, which were much warmer than the ocean overall, was a fun way to get our feet wet without freezing!

There was a sandbar out a ways that could only be reached during low tide. It was a gathering place on and off during the week. Here you can see the first of many family gatherings there.

And the mighty team of Poppy and Jonathan were always together, heads bent, always looking. Determined to find their treasure.

And SUCCESS!!! Overall, Jonathan found three or four whelks and chose a few to bring home. They will be the happy home of some air plants as soon as we clean them off.

Even Mom braved the water to head out to the sandbar! I think this was her only venture into the water.

We also discovered that Laura loves water. And sand. And having her brother build things for her in the sand. Here Laura and Daddy play in the tide pools

And a picture of the three of us.

Mom and Dad

Mom and Diane

We were joined at the beach by my brother's family. They rented another house and we got to spend a lot of time together. Their house had central air - something we didn't think we'd need at the beginning of June at the beach but alas, we did. So common meals happened at his house. It was fun even though some folks had to sit on the floor to eat. Here's my brother, Scott, holding the always present shelling bag.

I'll post some more pictures of our trip in another post but this one, highlighting our beach adventures, wouldn't be complete without posting Matthew and Seth's attempts to body surf in the freezing cold, bone chilling ocean. I managed to catch one picture of them successfully 'catching a wave' but they are just dots buried on the white curls.

Jonathan joined them periodically but he had enough common sense to stay out of the water when it was just too cold. Smart boy, that one. :)

We finally were forced to pack up and head home. Since there was no ladder, we pulled the car up to the porch and Jonathan still helped load it from there. Here he is relishing his status as the chosen one to actually get on top of the car.

And so ends another week at the beach. It was refreshing, fun, relaxing, filled with family, packed with times we'll remember all year long as we plan for next years trip. Of course next year we'll rent a house with central air. :)

She's A Super Duper Pooper!

2008-06-04T14:16:00.002-04:00

Okay, okay, okay. Yes, I know. She'll regret that I displayed that to the world some day. But I have to tell you, I'm ready to shout it from the mountain tops and I'm thinking that letting the whole world know that your stubborn, 'won't poop in the potty' child has gone twice in a row in the potty is something so fabulous, I'm willing to live with the long term fallout. Trust me on this. It is BIG news!

After taking umpteen videos out of the library, learning potty song after potty song, after potty song, I find that the one that means the most to me now is the same one that I was singing 12 years ago, too. "I'm A Super Duper Pooper" is one of the songs on the "It's Potty Time" video. This video was a standard in our home when Matthew was potty training and refusing to poop in the potty, too. At the time we thought it was because David had so many issues with pottying, but now I'm wondering if it isn't just the norm for those lucky enough to be born in our long line of stubborn er... make that determined folk. But for whatever reason, I think we might be well on our way to kissing our diapers and pull ups goodbye forever - at least during the day.

Just moments ago Matthew, Jonathan and I gathered in the hallway in front of the bathroom as we heard cries of "MOMMY! I pooped on the potty!" come rolling out of the bathroom. We all clapped, cheered and serenaded her singing:

She's a Super Duper Pooper,

She can potty with the best.

No more diapers to get in her way,

I bet you are impressed!

She's a Super Duper Pooper,

She knows when she has to go.

Take a bow,

She's a big kid now,

She's the best pooper you know!

Yes, we did that. And we'll do it again. And again. And again. As long as it takes. And when we're done we'll be glad. But secretly, I'll know that I've potty trained for the last time. So while my heart is soaring with pride at her accomplishments, I'll be a bit sad as well. She's growing up. I'll have to come to grips with that. Someday. :)

The Layers Of Life

2008-06-04T11:43:00.002-04:00

Last week I quietly celebrated a milestone. One I share with my son, David. He's been gone for ten years now this past New Year's Day. Ten years we've gone on without him. Ten years that we've missed hearing his little, old man laugh. Ten years of family events, changes, and stories that he'll never know. Ten years that he's been whole and healthy, running through heaven, laughing all the way. He would have been twelve last week. Right smack dab in the middle of Matthew and Jonathan. Oh what sibling rivalry that might have been, eh? :)

Yesterday, another child joined him in heaven. Sydney, a beautiful, sweet little one who happened to have clubfeet had been out to see Dr. Ponseti in Iowa, was killed when her Angel Flights plane crashed shortly after take off. She would have turned 3 next month. Her mother, Christina, was with her. While Christina and the pilot suffered no long term injuries, Sydney died later in the day after her father was able to join them in Iowa in time to say goodbye.

My heart weeps for Christina. She has now joined the very private group of those who have lost children. She will know our private pain and our deep longing for what we can no longer have. She will have to balance the lives of those left behind with the memory of the child who has left her behind as she passed away, out her reach. She will wonder and go through endless what ifs in her mind. She'll dream about what she might have become had she lived as long as Christina dreamed she'd live when she first discovered that she was miraculously making another life within her own. She'll go through the blame, the bargaining and the weeping those of us in this very private world already intimately know. She will discover that time really does heal, but long before that happens, she will wonder if there will ever be enough time.

And in the midst of all of this, at the lowest points in her grief, she will begin to see that Sydney's life was full of purpose and joy. That she came for a reason, was here for a time and that, although she is now gone physically, she's never really gone. She will be a part of her life always. Nothing can change that. Not even death. She will realize that in Sydney's short life, she managed to touch more lives than Christina will ever begin to comprehend. That even though her life did not quite span three years, the number of people who are impacted by her will seem to fill a lifetime and more. And she will realize that none of us are here alone. There is always someone who enjoyed her laughter, loved to watch her eyes twinkle or couldn't wait to play with her another day. There will always be someone who will be willing to sit quietly with her while she cries at her loss and then rejoice with her as she shares sweet memories of Sydney, remembering even more as she talks. There will be sweet memories that will chase the tears away and suddenly, she'll realize that she's smiling again and it feels good. She'll find moments of peace and she'll begin to realize that her life is worth living and Sydney is cheering her on as she does.

David and Sydney lived their lives with all the strength, ability, joy and laughter they could muster. They would want us to go on. I am, with David's memories by my side. Christina will work through her grief and go on as well. Stronger. More determined than ever. With a dash of Sydney's laughter thrown in for good measure.

Soft, Cuddly Lovin' from Myshell

2008-06-03T14:48:00.002-04:00

Last week a box landed on our porch. In it was a hug of love from "Myshell" for Laura. As you can see she loves it. I must take it off of her several times a day so she doesn't eat it in, or have a chocolate snack while wearing it. She's worn it outside, put it on her babies, tried to wrap me in it when I looked like I needed a nap, and in general has made it one of her favorite things. Michelle made it for her and it is just beautiful, soft and oh so cozy. "Myshell wuvs me, huh Mom." Yes Laura, she does. Very much. :)

Stylin' Girl!

2008-06-03T14:32:00.002-04:00

You may recall that Laura started wearing glasses last fall. Not only did her eyes need some correction, but she has strabismus much like her brother so keeping her eye from turning in is part of her prescription as well. Last week we went for a check up expecting for everything to be fine. But no. It seems that, as is common with some kids with strabismus, the weak eye has decided not to do anything and the stronger eye has taken over. Her vision in her good eye tested at 20/40 and her bad eye was 2100! So began a long term effort with patching a few hours a day. Currently she does 3 hours a day. It fits over her glasses and is working once we put a kibosh on her desire to peek over the top of the patch by moving her glasses down a bit.

Here she is in all of her glory:

And here she is expressing her feelings about having to wear it.

Come On, Baby! Let's Do The Twist-er

2008-06-03T14:05:00.007-04:00

Friday Night Family Night has its ups and downs. Periodically, the boys have something planned or the kids head over to Mom and Dads for the night or we just are all wiped out making the night a low key one with not much happening beyond the hope that we'll find a good movie to watch while we all die quietly on The People Magnet. Other nights find us with a board game or card game out, trying to figure out how to keep Laura involved and still play a good game before she heads to bed. And then there are nights like last week...

Laura and Jonathan had ventured to the basement playroom storage to find a new supply of games earlier in the week. They had returned with Hi-Ho Cherry-O, Guess Who, Candy land and Twister. Quite the combo, wasn't it? Laura instantly fell in love with Hi-Ho Cherry-O and Jonathan tried his best to teach her the logic of Guess Who even though she's only four. Candy land is okay but as you may already know, it can take forever to play one game and her attention span isn't that long. And then there's Twister. As the week progressed, any time seemed a good time to pull out the game and try to talk someone in to playing with you. Laura learned how to spin and call out the color and the relatively correct appendage and we all learned how to change it on the fly to accommodate her lacking leg span and arm width.

As Friday approached, Jonathan began lobbying for a 'game night' where we'd play until we dropped. He wanted to play Narnia, agreed to some Hi-Ho Cherry-o to make Laura happy and wanted to play some group rounds of Twister. His mistake was starting there. :) Matthew quickly became quite competitive with Don to see who might reign supreme. Laura learned that getting under anyones body could be hazardous when the mat is that full, and Jonathan decided that playing with Mom and Laura was a lot different than competing with his testosterone laiden older brother and Dad. We played many rounds. It was fun. Don and Matthew worked up a sweat while I learned how to foil one or both with a well-placed push. By the end of that game we called it quits for the evening. Don and Matthew were done in and I was just done. We headed upstairs, put Laura to bed, gathered on The People Magnet and promptly fell asleep.

Here are a few highlights from the evening:

At first Laura was involved and very interested. Even though she'd get pushed out or fall, she'd jump back in to the fray midgame and continue.

Then things got serious and we all bowed out to watch Dad and Matthew battle it out for testosterone supremacy:

And even though things got a little too close for Don's comfort now and then...

And despite the fact that Jonathan tried to effect the outcome...

In the end, there was one winner...

Dad won the night.

Dadsense!

2008-05-28T15:55:00.003-04:00

Here at the good ol' homestead, it seems we are a lot like other homesteads the world over. We honor the 'Father of the House' and totally appreciate that he goes out in to the world each and every day to provide for us so that we can homeschool, read wonderful books out loud, play games, have tether ball tournaments, bake, veg, and attempt to keep up somewhat with the housework and laundry. Hey, a guy needs clean clothes when he heads out to swim with the sharks, doesn't he? But deep down, we all know who runs the house. Mom.

Last year Anita Renfroe paid tribute to Moms with her wonderful, humorous ditty called Momsense. See it and read the words here. Recently, she was encouraged to pay homage to the men of the house as well so here's her new ditty, "Dadsense".

My Fwowers Are Still Awive!!!

2008-05-13T13:05:00.004-04:00

You heard it here, first. Laura's flowers are still alive. The flowers on her pull ups that is. No longer are they cut short in their prime, melting in to the background, blending in to a bluish tinge where once they stood tall and proud. NO! They are alive! Growing in the Princess Garden of Potty Training Success!!! And I honestly couldn't be happier.

For months, years even, we've seen garden after garden fall to the same watery fate. I began wondering if her Pediatrician was right when he said she wouldn't walk down the aisle in diapers. I began to wonder if, in fact, she was just stubborn enough to do it just to prove him wrong. But patience is, once again, rewarded to those who can manage it.

Something clicked last week. We were waiting for her therapy session to begin early Monday morning and she was playing with Hannah, a sister to one of the other girls in therapy. Hannah is younger than Laura by more than a year and has been potty trained for a long time. However, she recently backslid a bit and was in pull ups for awhile. She's now back in pretty little panties and she was not hesitant to show them off while we waited. Laura must have thought about that for a few days because by Wednesday she was determined to go "pee pee on the potty" regularly. For the first few days I reminded her every hour or so and she went, dutifully and her flowers lived! Then by the weekend she was reminding herself and getting to the potty when she needed to. She even ditched the potty seat and was balancing herself on the potty without it. And we regularly hear "My fwowers are still awive!" coming from the bathroom as she sits there waiting. It is music to my ears. :)

We still have the need to provide extra fertilization for all of those growing flowers, but I think the days of wetting them in to oblivion is almost past us. I'm so proud of her right now I could bust. And I can't wait until she's really able to be a 'big girl' in every sense of the word!

GO LAURA!!

Who Is In Charge Here?

2008-05-08T17:30:00.002-04:00

While there may periodically be a question in the boys minds about who is in charge here, it seems Laura has not a doubt about the bottom line. When home, she'll start in with the whole four year old 'please' thing when she wants something she thinks she needs, and after a few "No" statements from me, I end it by having a conversation with her as follows:

Me: I said no. What does Mommy mean when she says "No"?
Laura: No.
Me: And who is in charge here?
Laura: You are.
Me: So, I mean what I say and I'm in charge. Do you think you are going to get XXX then?
Laura: No.
Me: Then don't ask again.
Laura: Okay.

But you always wonder when you aren't with her just what she thinks. This week I found out. Apparently at therapy she was giving Miss Merri Jo a run for her money, acting all four year oldish. So Merri Jo asked her just who was in charge at home betting that Laura would say she was in charge given her determination to drive Merri Jo crazy that day. But no. Very seriously she said "Mommy is in charge."

Now, if only she could teach the boys that it is true - even when you are ten and fourteen.

Builder Extraordinaire!

2008-05-07T10:04:00.003-04:00

It would seem that the Head Builder at the Lego Warehouse, located right here in our very humble abode, is rather predictable. If you hear that empty silence in the house, you can be pretty sure he's somewhere building with legos. And when you hear the telltale 'scratch' of a hand digging through a bunch of lego bricks that periodically punctuates that silence, you can tell whether he's in the family room or his bedroom surrounded by lego bins, working on some new creation. All in all, that's how it works around here most days after our school work is finished.

Which is why, when I came upon something new a few days ago, I was totally amused. As I walked around the corner I saw this:

If you look closely you can see that he is sitting on an old, red, Little Tykes toddler chair. Or perhaps I should say that he's 'balancing' on it. And you will also note that he needs to sit on the old, red, Little Tykes toddler chair because he's sitting at Laura's table and, as might seem obvious to most, it was made for toddler and preschoolers. We won't mention that the chairs that came with it have arm rests and his bucket won't fit in those... Also note that Laura is hanging around Matthew while he works - at her table - as she's a bit territorial about it. After all, it was Auntie Diane's when she was little and she loves it. No one else is supposed to fit at it and she enjoys autonomy in her little realm. Until now.

Matthew sat on that little red chair until he built some 20 miniature pistols, rifles, alien sub machine guns and who knows what else. And then he moved on to an armored personnel carrier so he could fill it with the dudes that carried all of that metal. Perhaps someday he'll be an engineer for the military where he can put all of this wonderful knowledge to a good use. Until then, Laura will just have to share her table. :)

Ya Think?

2008-05-07T09:44:00.003-04:00

Sometimes, some thing or other starts out relatively innocent and then snowballs out of control. It is here that Matthew or Jonathan might insert the comment "Ya think?" but since we are no longer using it here, they'd be having to apologize and back track for a few minutes so I am ever hopeful that they'd just keep their mouth shut instead.

The comment started innocently enough. I made some statement that was indeed fact for our household, Matthew knew he'd gone over the line. In an apparent attempt to let me know he knew what he'd done, he said in a rather sarcastic tone "Ya think?" and rolled his eyes. I didn't realize just how far that would go and how often it would be repeated, and if I did I'd have shut it down right then. Since I didn't, "ya think" became something like a battle cry for semi hysterical hormonal teenagers residing here. Instead of admitting they were wrong, they'd just say "Ya think?" and be done with it.

It drove me nuts but I thought it would go away on its own. I picked my battles and thought that they would get the hint about that one by osmosis. Or perhaps even by my dreaming it they would just wake up one day and say to themselves that they totally got how full of rebellion and sass it was and they'd be stopping it that day. Yes, I do dream don't I?

Finally I could take it no more. I told them that we wouldn't be using that phrase in this house any longer and that by using it they were acknowledging that they'd need to apologize to everyone who heard it, and that perhaps some other consequences would raise their common sense head if it didn't curtail right quick thereafter.

I noted yesterday that indeed there was a much more peaceful attempt to communicate. Some of the normal, obnoxious, get your brother at all costs banter was no longer nearly as mean. Attitudes had begun to come back to some semblance of normalcy. Could it have really been that simple? Could banning such terminology from their mouths have made such a difference? Surely there has to be more to it?

No. It seems that's the only change we've made. Of course I can't discount the effects of Pastor Jeff's sermon on Sunday morning, or the ever constant prayer said over them daily during my quiet time with the Lord. But this seems to be the major change. I guess simple things really do matter. Especially when it is a matter of the heart.

Sounds I Hear...

2008-05-02T09:04:00.003-04:00

Sometimes, well usually, the boys dread something they have to do so they put it off until the last minute. Yesterday, Matthew had to write a blank verse poem for extra credit and he knew that although it was an option for his teacher, it wasn't for his Mom so he finally sat down to do it. He whipped it out in a mere ten minutes tops. And he was quite proud if it.

When the kids write, you really see just what it is they are thinking. In the past few years I've learned that they love time with us on 'the people magnet' (or bed) where we read together or watch television, I now know that they don't often remember the times we try to 'create a memory' as much as they just remember the times in life where laughter was the main sound you heard, and I've realized that even though they are growing older, they still absolutely love the time spent listening to me read aloud a book they'd never choose to read themselves. Hank the Cow Dog, the entire Narnia series, The Absolutely True Story of How I Visited Yellowstone Park With The Terrible Rupes, Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle, Cal and the Anti-Gravity Machine, Raising Dragons and many more have been our nightly companions in the past few years and while I love reading out loud to them, it seems they love it even more. Who knew? :):)

Here's Matthew's latest masterpiece. It made me smile and it brought tears to my eyes. As you know Matthew felt very good about his effort. And it is good to know once again what is shaping his world. He's becoming a young man, attempting to find his place. And yet, he knows he belongs here. I am so proud. :)

Sounds I Hear
By

Matthew

Outside the sounds I hear are many,
The gentle whoosh of the wind,
The giggles of kids running and playing,
The thumps of my friends playing basketball,
And when I do the lawn,
The roar of the tractor or lawn mower
Chopping the grass into little pieces.

Inside the sounds I hear are annoying,
The voice of my brother waking me up,
The whine of my sister crying or screaming
In the middle of class,
The roar of my mother telling me
“pick up your room”!!

But after all this,
The sounds are lovely.
The opening of the door when my Dad comes home,
The sizzle and crackle of dinner being made,
The silence of resting after the gym,
The laughter as we read out loud,
And finally, the sound of nothing while trying to go to sleep.

Kidisms

2008-04-30T09:32:00.002-04:00

Just as Art Linkletter used to say, kids do say the darndest things. Especially, it would seem, around here. In the last few days I've overheard the following:

While Laura was playing with her dolls, she apparently grew tired and wanted to eat a snack. Since I was holding one of her dolls for her because the doll was sick and needed some loving, she noted that I wasn't going to be able to get a snack for her if I were holding her doll. Being the brilliant child she is, she came over to me, took the doll out of my hands and said "Come here, Baby. I'll put you away now to sleep". Oh if only it were that simple sometimes...

The boys were playing together - bionicles this time - when Laura happened upon their 'game'. She quickly ran to get her own 'guys' to add in. Never mind that they were dolls from her Sweet Streets set. And the boys could have cared less. Apparently it doesn't matter if your 'guys' wear pink or purple. Just as long as they fit right in. I watched casually through the door crack to see what happened. I overheard Laura saying "Bang, bang, bang" as she pointed her dolls arm at a much bigger bionicle. Matthew reminds her that they don't shoot guns, they shoot lasers so she adjusts on the fly. "Bang, bang, shew, shew, shew" Yeah, she gets it. :)

As we were out and about last week in the warmth I overheard a conversation between a rather nosey neighbor and Jonathan. Apparently he is being quizzed about school. To what end I can only imagine so I don't go there. I am, however, exceedingly proud of Jonathan. He answered practically, honestly, and with more information that I think she expected. After droning on and on about WWII, how ancient architecture is mirrored in some of the buildings in town as well as some famous ones, how neat it was when he got the times tables memorized so well he could do them in under 5 minutes, how he really liked writing but hated that he had to actually edit what he wrote by being sure it was spelled correctly, made sense and had all of the proper punctuation and grammar included that it lost some charm, (yes, he said "charm"), and then went on and on about rock formations, chemical and physical weathering, erosion and how to prevent it and oh so many other things in science, he finally realized her eyes were glazed over and she wasn't really able to take in all he was saying so he ended it by saying "So, I guess that was a bit TMI. Did you want me to answer a specific question instead of going over what I learned last week?" Ah, the wisdom of youth.

Matthew was watching an old episode of Green Acres because we'd been singing the theme song around here lately. He looked up at me after a few minutes and said "You know, without the canned laughter, it just wouldn't be all that funny." Hmmm... maybe he has something there.

And finally, Laura was trying very hard to get attention from someone. Anyone, actually. It wasn't going well and she was quietly expressing that dogged determination that is becoming her hallmark. When calling all of our names, pulling on our body parts, and even standing in front of us and attempting to climb on our laps didn't produce any results, she regrouped and came up with a new tactic. She collected a few of her dollies and started taking care of them, murmuring to them and patting them on the back. Then, when one was apparently inconsolable, she brought them to me. Amused by her new efforts at getting attention, I took the baby and started rocking it, soothing it and patting it. I told it a story and was cooing over it. Laura, thinking I might have lost a few marbles, gently touched my shoulder and said "Mommy, you know dat's not your baby, right?"

Kids. They say the darndest things!

Guiness World Record? If Only They Knew...

2008-04-29T08:51:00.003-04:00

I'm sure that your family is one of those very organized, on time, always at the ready families that shares the highs of your day with everyone at dinner, quoting your favorite scripture and sharing at least three new facts you learned that day. Uh, yeah. Riiiiight. Well, ours isn't either. And lately, along with the new joke, suduko puzzle or review of the comical things that happened that day, the boys have tried a new adventure. Their own attempts to get in to the Guinness Book of... well... Family Records.

Yes, with food.

No, I didn't start it. Really! I didn't!!!

A few days ago, lacking the desire to put something green on the table, I produced the most recent acquisition of round red globes and plopped them on the table instructing everyone that grapes were the 'vegetable of the day' and they all needed to eat a nice serving. Whatever that is. As the meal went on, Matthew opted to set a limit so I couldn't badger them in to eating more and suggested that they eat twice their age in grapes. After a quick figuring stint in my brain, I declared it an excellent idea and Matthew set about picking 28 grapes from the bowl. Soon it seemed just eating them wasn't good enough. No. He'd have to see how many he could fit in to his mouth at the same time. Yes, my stomach did a little lurch but hey, whatever gets them to eat them, right??? As you can assume, that would come back to haunt me.

On the first day with the grapes, Matthew managed to get 17 in before he couldn't spare anymore room while laughing hysterically to stick any more in. He was satisfied with that. Oh how soon they forget that sense of satisfaction...

Just 24 hours later we were sitting at the table once again. Gathered, like a wonderfully loving family, eating dinner idyllically together, reviewing our um... well... you get the drift. We were eating dinner. And green beans were the 'green' of the day. As dinner began to wind down, I happened to glance at each child's plate, noting immediately that while the evidence of homemade chicken fingers and fries were there, not an iota of evidence existed for the previous presence of green beans. I reminded them that a healthy serving of green beans needed to hit their plate, and by extension their stomachs, before they got up from the table. Matthew willingly piled green beans on his plate and passed the bowl to Jonathan. Score one for parental persistence.

However, my parental success ended there. Soon I noted a gleam in Matthew's eye. He looked up at us with a sneaky smile on his face and said "Gee, last night I got in 17 grapes. I wonder how many green beans I can fit in my mouth!" Note, he was excited at the prospect. I hung my head wondering just where I could get off this train. Apparently, not any time soon. Before I knew it he was lobbing greeners in to his cavernous orifice and counting at the same time. I began to wonder somewhere around 80 if any more would fit in. I needn't have worried. They did. Many more. Many, many more. In fact, Matthew emptied the bowl and might have grabbed the leftovers off of Jonathan's and Laura's plates but by that time he was laughing too hard to even think of stuffing more in before he relieved the pressure. Grinning takes up space you know.

As it turns out, you can fit 140 green beans in his mouth. Yes, as he noted several times, if you suck the juice out, you can pack more in. Slobbering, as needed. I'm not sure that is a certified Guinness practice, but whatever works!

After spitting out much of what was in his mouth so he could actually swallow his original serving, Jonathan wanted to see if, in fact, there was such a record. Alas, the Guinness site is not forthcoming regarding the amount of green beans one can stuff in ones mouth at one time. I imagine they ought to think more like teenage boys and their world record categories could increase dramatically. Just ask Matthew and Jonathan. :)

My Gift

2008-04-28T13:38:00.005-04:00

Last week was one of 'those weeks'. You know, the kind that finds you dreaming about the end long before it ever even begins. The kind you dread long before it starts and seem to suffer through as you go, willing the end to come much more quickly than it normally would. The kind you'd like to forget. It was Ohio Achievement Testing Week. Yes, all caps. Because it has become an event in our lives. An event I'd rather not have to do, but must.

Because we choose to school at home, my children are enrolled in public charter virtual schools or eschools as some might call them. And I'm very glad they are. Honestly, for Matthew it is a great thing because I'm NOT his primary teacher. He's enrolled in a program that has a virtual option meaning he logs in to class with teachers and attends with other students much like he would if he were in the local brick and mortar. His teachers go the extra mile and help him with concepts he's having trouble with, and he has the option to log in and access tutoring at any time from whatever teacher is manning that subject at the time. For Matthew, it is the best of both worlds. He can be social and yet he's here at home where he's developing in to a wonderful young man. Jonathan is enrolled in another program that allows him to work at his own, accelerated pace so he is accomplishing much more than he might be able to in a brick and mortar. This means that as he ends his fourth grade year, he's doing fifth grade work that he'll most likely finish by Christmas and then they'll allow him to move on. The curriculum is accelerated anyway, so it is nice to see Jonathan learning at his level as I watch him grow and blossom under my teaching. It is the best of both worlds for all of us. And next year Laura will join in the fray with a home-based preschool curriculum as I prepare to enroll her in to the program Jonathan is using. It should be a fun year for all of us!

So what does all of this have to do with the picture of my wonderful hubby? Well, once a year the requirements of public schooling descend on us and we must show up somewhere with all of the other students in our area to take the achievement tests. This year that meant that last week,three mornings were scheduled for Jonathan and four afternoons were scheduled for Matthew. As we eschooling parents gathered at each testing location, conversations about our lives inevitably took place. You compare where your kids are in the curriculum, how they are handling assignments, what you choose to use and what you choose to skip, and so on. And after you've finished discussing the children, the topic of family life shifts to the top of the subject matter under consideration.

In the give and take of conversations I recall feeling overwhelmed time and time again. Not negatively, mind you. But overwhelmed with the knowledge that our life was pretty wonderful no matter how you looked at it. Oh yes, there are things I need to change/do better/improve on/etc. but we are doing just fine, thank you very much. My kids were not growing up extremely rebellious, they aren't in to things that they'll regret later in life, and none of them are living a life that is completely against our family values. They are pretty wonderful and I am thankful every day that I am able to be home with them.

However, the thing that I found I was most thankful for each and every day was my Gift, - my husband of almost six years now. My Don. He is truly one of the best gifts the Lord has ever provided for me. The one that grounds me. The one that keeps me surrounded by acceptance, stability, comfort and a touch of reality. The one that supports me no matter what I choose to try, that keeps me on the straight and narrow as I often try to bite off more than I can chew. And the one that reaches out to touch and soothe me when I feel like I just can't do it anymore, encouraging me by reminding me what we've already accomplished and how much more fun there is ahead. Yes, even in the teen years. And then there's the love and acceptance. He completely loves and accepts me just the way I am. No matter how many quick fix meals he must endure because we were too busy to start dinner earlier. Or how many times he has to pick his socks and underwear out of the laundry basket we haven't managed to fold yet. Or how many times he has to help get the house picked up and the dishes done even after working a full day at the office. Yes, I have been given a gift. A gift that was even more evident as I listened to others discuss their lives.

I sat in small groups last week listening to many Moms talk about the mess their lives are, how their older children or stepchildren are causing so many disturbances in their households that it is hard to get things done, let alone on time or in any kind of schedule. Or how their husbands don't support their schooling choices and don't help around the house. And even how they use money, sex or other manipulative means to control them in front of and away from the children. Sometimes what they admitted so astounded me that I couldn't even figure out what to say so I just kept my mouth shut, attempting to keep my chin from hitting the floor in the process. Other times, I just quietly thanked the Lord that he gave me not only the best parents in the world, some pretty awesome kids, but Don as well. I can't imagine what life might have been like if not for those blessings. And I'm glad I don't have to worry about it. I'll just keep on thanking him for my gifts and enjoying life with my husband and my children.

I have been blessed. And I am forever thankful for my Gifts - all of them!

Spring Cleaning

2008-04-20T20:14:00.003-04:00

It seems that every season brings some new job that must be done. Sometimes in involves changing an entire wardrobe from one season to the next in all four closets, sometimes it means changing decorations or deep cleaning some part of the house. And sometimes it means doing yard work until you feel like your arms are going to fall off as you dodge raindrops that just insist on falling on your otherwise wonderful day. Yesterday, Daddy and Laura were the only ones home so they ventured out to clean up the lawn a bit. Well, Daddy did some cleaning while Laura played. I think she managed to locate and extricate every lawn toy we might own and a few that I'm not sure I've ever seen before. And she also decided that since the boys weren't home, she could play with their toys as well - without being yelled at. She was in her element.

When I asked her how she thought the boys would feel if they knew she had their guns out, she responded as only a four year old can who has been taught by store clerks how to respond to brothers when you've gotten away with something and they haven't. Yes. The dreaded Nananananana. Somehow she even makes that look cute...

Sand Crabs In Ohio?

2008-04-20T19:50:00.004-04:00

It would seem that an invasion of sorts is happening right here in my very own backyard. An invasion so unique to our area that I'm sure they are very few and far between. The last time we had this invasion, I documented it and really didn't plan on the need to document it again given the extensive clean up involved. Oh how wrong I was. Apparently memories are rather short lived and the long winter months spent burying themselves in the snow kept the dream alive.

I should have been suspicious this afternoon when Jonathan ran in and told me to get my camera and come outside quickly. I probably should have asked more questions on the way out, but the sinking feeling in my stomach told me to just go out and face the music without being forewarned. After having spent at least ten minutes trying to wash the sand out of Laura's hair last Tuesday, I just couldn't face the thought of having to do it all over again so soon. So I didn't ask.

As I came out on to the deck, I noted a small, pink head sticking up in the sand. Upon further investigation, this is what greeted me:

And then Jonathan, obviously feeling like he hadn't buried her quite deep enough, set about to add even more to the pile.

And then even more!

Finally Laura could stand it no more. She asked much more politely than I would have if I had little sand particles invading every nook and cranny of my body, if he was finished and if perhaps she might get up. Reluctantly Jonathan gave his okay and Laura broke free from her the cocoon of sand.

She lost her balance a bit on the sand but finally emerged. Standing, but covered in sand.

As I type, Jonathan has been assigned to wash her hair and I've already spent at least 30 minutes trying to get all of the sand off of the kitchen floor, bathroom floor and out of her clothing. We won't even discuss how much Jonathan will add to the pile when he gets ready for a shower...

And so the crab season begins here in Ohio. Who knew? I think, given all that has transpired in the sandbox over the years, I should have known. Maybe it is time to build an outdoor shower...

The Mitchell FAB Strap Repair

2008-04-20T19:33:00.003-04:00

Our Mitchell FAB had a weak spot on the strap that finally broke. I'd been treating it carefully knowing I would have to dig up a shoe repair place for repairs once it did break and I didn't recall one close. But it gave way and a repair became necessary. After a search for one close, I finally found a guy about 15 minutes away who said he'd take a look at it and he'd see what he could do. I took a picture of another repair you can see on Shawnee's six feet site here (scroll down on the left hand side)so he'd know what another cobbler tried that worked. He took that idea and came up with his own.

As you can see by the pictures below, he matched the leather color, surrounded the strap with a double layer and told me it wasn't going anywhere any time soon. He is right. Our only issue with it is that if the repair were just a bit longer, it would go through the buckle a bit easier. However, I'm thrilled I didn't have to bother John with making a new shoe for the few months we have left with this pair.

"Ring, Ring, Ring, Ring"

2008-04-09T09:46:00.002-04:00

"Hello, Daddy? I wuv you!

How are you?

What are you doing?

Oh dat's good.

Well... I'm going to get busy here in a minute and do da ditches but first I'm going to talked to you somemores. So, what are you doing?

Oh. Dat's good. Do you wike doing dat?

Ummm... Mommy said I had to get dwessed becaused we're going to go to da wibrary waiter when you comed home. So I'm dwessed and it is so pwetty! You will weally wike it! And Mommy said she's going to do my haired. I don't want her to do dat but she's gonna anyways. But it will keep it from detting knowtty.

No. I'm not going to do dat.

Because Jonathan is meaned to me when I annoyed him so I'm supposed to be good today. So I'm not going to pway wif him.

So, what are you doing?

Well, I need to go get my babies dwessed for the day. Dey are hungry and if I'm a good Mommy I will feed dem. And one of my babies has poopies so I have to change her diaper. It stinks! See you waiter, Daddy!

I wuv you, too! Bye!"

And so it goes in Laura's world this morning.

Clubfoot Saga April Update

2008-04-08T16:04:00.003-04:00

Dr. Dobbs is by far one of the most amazing specialists we've seen in our ongoing saga of 'Laura's Life'. He listens, understands and counsels with such a gentle spirit that I find I am in awe of him even though he doesn't intend for that to happen. I'm thankful he's available for us and I feel very confident putting Laura's feet, and her future comfort and abilities, in his very caring hands.

I didn't know what to expect from our follow up appt. yesterday, but I felt that everything would be okay. As I packed, I prepared for more casting and Laura even realized that it might be a possibility as well. Last week she started talking about it and the conversation went something like this:

Me: We're going to St. Louis this weekend to see Nana and then Dr. Dobbs.
Laura: Yeah! I get to sweep at Nana's house in my new sweeping bag!!!
Me: Yes, and then we'll go see Dr. Dobbs.
Laura: I don't want to see Dr. Dobbs. He'll put casts on me and I don't want casts. *slight pause* I want pinked ones dis time! Can I have pinked ones dis time, Mommy?
Me: *amazed at the quick transition she can make when faced with having pink legs again* Yes, you can have pink ones again. I'll be sure to pack a dress that will match.

So I went about getting ready, confident that her little brown skirt would work well with possible pink casts. Little did I know it wouldn't matter.

We were at the Hospital bright and early Monday morning. Kristina came in to say hi and I gave her a big hug. She works so well with Dr. Dobbs and cares about the patients just as much as he does. I'm glad she is there for us, too. Soon, Dr. Dobbs came in and he checked out Laura's feet, did some assessments and evaluated where we were. He asked some questions to clarify her previous care and I prepared to hear the word osteotomy in his conversation. However, it never came.

It seems he thinks she might have some nerve damage and that is what is preventing her foot from staying corrected. His plan is to have a Neurologist conduct a nerve study to verify it and then to proceed with some form of tendon transfer to help her muscles and such work properly to help keep her foot corrected. He also told us to quit using the SMO's - can you say shoe shopping??? - and not to use the AFO that we'd been told to use, and measured for but had yet to pick up, last fall. He wants her to learn to use and depend on her own muscles and not use the SMO's as a crutch any longer. They've apparently served their purpose well but it is time to move on.

I remember floating out of the office and back in to more wonderful sunshine. I know that we have some difficult times ahead as they'll have to put her under for the nerve study and she'll have some form of surgery yet ahead of her, but all in all I'm thrilled. He told us that indeed she'll have good, workable feet and that she'll really be fine in the end. It is what we've dreamed of, prayed for and dared to dream about from the beginning. I feel like the end just may be in sight.

Meanwhile, I think I'll go shoe shopping. :)

Another Quick St. Louis "Drive By"

2008-04-08T15:36:00.007-04:00

As I prepared for our trip to St. Louis to see Nana and, of course Dr. Dobbs, it rarely seemed like it was actually going to happen. Our last few trips have been plagued by snow - faaaar toooo much snow as a matter of fact - so perhaps I felt that another storm would hit us without warning. Or perhaps I felt like we'd reached the end of the line and I really didn't see what other options we had besides bone surgery or continued casting, and I wasn't sure I wanted to hear that final answer. But the need to know combined with the desire to see my Nana took precedence and I prepared for what would turn out to be a record 19 replays of "Are we there yet?" and 26 "How much longer" repeats. I'd keep score by kid but that would have required far too much thought. So I stuck with the basics.

We left at the beginning of what would become a wonderfully sunny, warm day. As we drove through Indiana and Illinois I was struck by how green everything was. Not only was the sun shining for us, but the spring green grass was everywhere and buds were on the trees. Daffodil, crocus and tulips were blooming, and bugs actually splattered the windshield, (if I weren't in such a hurry I'm sure we could have gotten a science lesson out of that somehow) and we felt like we were on a bit of a vacation instead of a medical trip. And that's not all bad no matter how you look at it!

When we arrived in St. Louis, my precious Nana had dinner almost made. But after spending 9 hours in the car a walk seemed in order. We started out together but soon, keeping us that way took effort. Here we are, minus Jonathan, about to head down the little development she lives in:

As we'd walk along, I'd keep turning back (or looking ahead) to see where everyone else was. Sometimes I'd find just Mom, Nana and Laura in a group and other times they'd all be together having discovered something interesting. Here, Jonathan and Matthew are figuring out that a new stump once held a tree lived 36 years before someone took it down:

When we finally got back to Nana's house, the boys decided a little tree climbing was in order so up Matthew went. Jonathan, on the other hand, wasn't exactly tall enough to get a good leg up...

Finally, Matthew went as high as I'd let him go given his propensity for falling out of them at the most inopportune moments and all I could see were all of those beautiful buds on the tree. OH for spring to arrive here, too!!!

After our walk we had a wonderful visit with Nana before we headed to bed. Our time at the Red Ruby Inn is always too short but I'm so thankful the Proprietress always fits us in. Thanks, Nana! We love you!!!

And Now It's Time For A Little Science!

2008-04-01T15:33:00.007-04:00

What does mass wasting, gravity, water, and a sandbox all have in common? Science, of course! Specifically, Jonathan's science lesson of the day. It seems that the lab today required him to form various grades using a cookie sheet and soil in order to determine how rain, gravity and soil all worked together to cause erosion, and then of course deposition. Rills, creeks, rivers, tributaries, sediment and deltas seemed to be the words of the day and I was thoroughly enjoying the boys foray in to science. Until...

So let me get this straight. You want to take my cookie sheet - the one that Honey and Poppy got for a wedding gift, the one that is so well made they just don't make them like that any more - and you want to plop some soil on it to imitate rills, creeks, rivers and tributaries???? Uhhhh... okay! Sure. Just do it outside!!!

Thankfully, we're experiencing just a touch of spring and the boys could head out and enjoy some homemade erosion before the rain hit and did it for real. Off they went. To the sandbox with my cookie sheet and the pitcher of water, ready to do battle as the elements. They managed to have a wonderful time making rivers that flowed downstream at various rates and even managed to track a larger piece of sand or two in the process. They formed their own paths as needed to imitate rivers flowing in to tributaries, and then realized just how a delta might form because they made one themselves. Thankfully, Don had the outside water spouts turned off or they might have well been on their way to a scale model ocean, too. In our once dry sandbox.

Isn't science fun???

Here's Matthew explaining their experiments:

Preparing for the final experiment:

The final erosion in progress:

And Jonathan's feeling of success!!! Let's see, he got outside mid morning to play in the sandbox with my cookie sheet and pitcher along with everything they already have out there. Yeah! It was definitely a success on sooo many levels!!!

No More Naps! Unless...

2008-03-31T08:06:00.003-04:00

Several months ago Laura decided that napping wasn't in her schedule. They were just wasted time to her. Time when she could be doing oh so much more. Time when there were worlds to conquer, books to read, games to play, and brothers to annoy. No, naps were just in her way. And she couldn't be persuaded otherwise - especially after moving to her 'big girl bed' where bars no longer impeded her escape.

*sigh*

I will be the first to admit that I miss it. Totally. Not only will there be no more napping children in my life, but there will be no more naps until I'm old enough to be taking them myself. Naps were the best time for catching up on school work with the boys, writing a note to a friend, or just reading a good book uninterrupted. Naps were the perfect time to daydream a little, write up a list, or plan the next grocery shopping trip without excess scribbles on it from a 'helper'. Yes, naps were fabulous. But they are no more.

Well...

Perhaps now and then it still might be okay. When the mood is just right, the day is cloudy and you are stuck indoors with Daddy, perhaps a nap is just the ticket. :)

Of Teens and Preschoolers

2008-03-27T09:00:00.003-04:00

Last night as Matthew returned from youth group, he dropped his coat on the hall tree, grabbed a drink, bounded up the stairs and in to our room where he declares "Mom, tomorrow I have to look for a job." My stunned brain could not wrap itself around that declaration quickly enough to respond with anything but "after you finish your school work" as he bounded back out of our room. After he left it seemed like hours passed before I could pry my fingers off of the book I had been reading, force my eyes to blink at least once, and return my jaw to its normal, upright position. And then, instead of thinking about how wonderful it was that he finally was going to start taking some responsibility for his own success, I began to wonder what he was up to.

Could it be that he needed some money to pay off the skateboard bookie apparently running numbers on ollies around the corner from church? No, it couldn't be that. Hmmm... maybe he was so inspired by the message from his cell leader that he had dedicated his remaining teen years to missions giving and wanted to get started right away. Uh, no. I'm not sure that Matthew consciously realizes there is a world beyond his own most of the time even though we are constantly reminding him. Hmmm... Perhaps he had an intense meeting with the Lord and was planning to get responsible in record time. Nah. I'd have been able to tell that by his demeanor, wouldn't I? There must be something he wanted to buy that he didn't think he could ask us to get for him and I'm sure I spent much of my restless sleep last night trying to figure out what that might be.

This morning the house was relatively quiet until after 8. We'd all gotten to bed late so I let them enjoy an extra hour of sleep. Soon, however, even their bodies knew it was time to get up and they wondered down for breakfast. It took every ounce of my being to wait patiently for Matthew to expound on his desires just 12 hours earlier. I didn't have long to wait. Before I knew it, I was listening to all of the wonderful things he'd achieved skateboarding before and after services the night before. At first I thought he was imagining the need for a new board. That made sense and he knew we were done buying them. But no, that didn't seem to be it. After all, he was talking about modifying the one he'd gotten for his birthday last year. Perhaps he wanted to buy a half or quarter pipe and I began thinking of all of the reasons why one didn't need to 'live' in our back yard. But no. That wasn't it either.

As Matthew talked, Laura had stopped her "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" dance routine as she became enthralled with his exciting stories of moves and tricks he accomplished the night before. She climbed up on my lap, silently willing Matthew's success at each trick he explained with every ounce of her little being. It wasn't long before he said "So Mom, I need a new helmet." Ah, the answer. A simple helmet. We'd be willing to get that as it was for his safety. Hey! Wait a minute! Didn't we already have a helmet that HE picked out and now adamantly refused to wear because it is *gasp* stupid?!?!?! Surely that helmet would work just fine. Surely he could wear it now. Matthew, ever watchful and apparently becoming much better at anticipating his parents response, waited for my mouth to begin opening to declare his ownership of a perfectly good helmet before he jumped in with "Really, Mom. It's too small. I need a new one. Before next week."

Immediately my aging mind started flipping through all of the responses I could give at the moment, weighting them in such categories as 'logical to adults but not teens', 'worth stating even if he isn't listening', 'not worth the long term arguments that will ensue' and so on. In my quiet yet quick contemplation, I happened to notice that Laura's head had come up from my shoulder and was now trained on my face. Could she, even as a budding four year old understand the dynamics of our conversation? Surely not! But, oh how wrong I was. Almost as quickly as the silence had entered the conversation, Matthew chose to attempt to make his point must one more time. "Really Mom. It's too small. My head has grown. I NEED a new helmet."

My eyes began making the journey from off in space, past Laura's face and up to Matthew's. But I never got past Laura's face. As his words hit her, she looked up at me, rolled her eyes, sighed and shook her head. Yes, even she understood the argument for what it was. And didn't hesitate to express her thoughts. The tension coming from Matthew was growing. I could choose to make matters worse and address his comments or I could relieve the tension by sharing Laura's response with him. I chose the latter. Yes, we all laughed. Yes, I'm sure Laura will do that again now that she's had tremendous reinforcement. No, the issue of a new helmet didn't get past that final plea. Will it be revisited again soon? Probably. Will it come out differently? Probably. But one thing is certain. Laura has teenage logic all figured out.

I can only hope that as those preteen and teenage hormones sweep through her in a few years, all of this wisdom will be swept right out of her system. If it's not, we're going to be dealing with a much more intelligent teen and I don't relish that one iota. Meanwhile, I'll start pricing helmets. Who knows. Maybe I'll get that garden weeded early this year. Yes! Love and logic can come in soooo handy, can't it? :)

Forever Easter Eggs

2008-03-25T11:38:00.003-04:00

In the year before Don and I married, his office held a contest to see who could produce the best decorated Easter Egg. Being the crafty person that I am, and of course wanting to impress him, I looked up some unique ways to decorate eggs and found a method that in essence decoupaged pretty paper on to an egg shape. I purchased an egg from the craft store and picked out some pretty tissue paper as well as some scrapbooking pages and what I think they called chinese paper, and brought it all home. Don chose what he wanted me to use and I attempted the first of what would turn out to be many Forever Easter Eggs. The process is simple and they turn out beautifully. Needless to say, he won the contest that year. Since then I've taught several others how to make them and created this basket while doing crafts with a neighbor girl one summer to keep her busy. I'll try to post the instructions soon. Meanwhile, here's a not so great close up of the eggs themselves.

Our FAB - The Mitchell Shoes on Shriners Version of a Dobbs Articulating Brace

2008-03-25T11:27:00.006-04:00

Here is the version of FAB that Laura is currently wearing. We love the Mitchell shoes and have always used them. When we started treatment with Dr. Dobbs, he introduced us to the articulating bar. Laura loves that and honestly, so do I. It works for her and I'm very thankful she can use it effectively. I've included several pictures of the FAB and then some pictures of her in the bar, standing and then crawling in it. The picture at the top is Laura in her sleep sack. Her feet can fit up in it, but she prefers to wear it with her feet stuck in the foot holes. Whatever works. :) If you have any questions, please feel free to ask.

Easter Candy Princess?

2008-03-25T11:19:00.002-04:00

Easter morning was quite rushed so we didn't have a chance to enjoy the kids Easter baskets until much later in the day. After the dishes were done and we were all doing our own thing it seems Laura just couldn't stand it any more. She had to discover what might have fallen under all of that pink grass. Clad in her new fuzzy princess shirt from Auntie Diane, she decided to investigate. When an adult finally discovered her, this is what we found. When questioned, she just said "I wanna fine my canny." I won't tell you how many times we wiped chocolate off of her chin but it is safe to say she just loves chocolate 'canny'. She is indeed a princess, isn't she? :)

March Came In Like a Lion and He Stayed For Awhile

2008-03-25T10:33:00.010-04:00

I have a very convoluted, sarcastic, yet lovable relationship with snow. Given where I live, that can cause issues, but we live with the choices others made for us when we were young. :) Meanwhile, I work on tolerating the cold, white stuff most of the time. Initally, that first big snowfall of the season serves to put me in the Christmas mood and I watch the big flakes fall with a smile on my face knowing that the wet, heavy snow that comes during that time of the year will cling to the trees and make the world a soft, wonderful place. A month later, however, the snow is just too cold for man or beast. I'm ready to be done with it. Waiting ever so impatiently for spring to arrive knowing I have several months yet before we'll see temps out of the 20's.

Lately, it is taking more work to tolerate the white stuff than it is worth, but then we've blown away the previous record for March snowfall by almost half a foot. Yes, it is an all-time record breaker here. And pictures from our blizzard two weeks ago will give you a hint of what we've endured. Well, I endured it. Don endured it. The kids - they had a blast. :)

The snow started to fall on Friday. It just kept coming. Inches an hour. By the end of the snowfall early Sunday morning, we had two feet of snow on the ground and the blizzard-like winds had blown it all around in some very beautiful ways. When we finally ventured in to the snowy wonderland, we couldnt' open the door. Needless to say, it took hours to dig us out. Here are just a few pictures of our weekend.

Here are some views through the windows during the storm on Friday:

On Sunday morning, we started to take stock. Here's the snow piled up against the house and Laura's climber on the back deck. I took the picture after opening the slider and praying it wouldn't fall in on me!

Here's picture of the snow that was piled up by the front door. We couldn't open it from the inside until Don made this shovel-side path.

The Leader of the Shoveling Brigade had a smile on his face for awhile. After a few hours, it was not quite as bright. Here he is at the very beginning of the day:

And all of the guys were working on the driveway together:

My front bushes didn't fair so well with the heavy snow but they look better now that it has melted some.

The winds carved beautiful snow sculptures everywhere. Here's the overhang by the garage. Pretty, isn't it?

As they dug out, the boys formed a hill by the driveway. All of that snow had to go somewhere. They figured they'd use it to their advantage!

After the hill was formed, the boys took a break to try it out while Don continued to work:

Don finally found the end of the driveway:

And even made a path to the street. I'm sure he was busy praying that the snow plows wouldn't come back and plow him in again any time soon.

The kids all had a blast on the 'hill'. Even the neighborhood boys came over to give it a try on Sunday, and then Monday after school. They'd go down with and without snowboards and sleds. Laura was especially brave for her first sledding adventure.

On Monday, they decided the pile at the end of the driveway would make a nice snow fort. Here they are building, and then playing in it. Note the school bus in the second picture. Once again they experienced yet another advantage of being schooled at home - you can play in the snow before it melts away!

In the end, the driveway and the walkway were cleared by all of the boys, and then with more help from the sun. Everyone had a great time playing in the deep snow and Don and I prayed it would be the last one of the season. Alas, we've had several snow falls since then, but they melted away much more quickly. It is March after all, isn't it? The only thing that didn't fair so well was our mailbox. We tried to keep a clear path for our wonderful mailman but somehow, I think he saw a lot of them just like ours for the next few days. I'm thankful the snow is almost over for the year. I'm very ready for Spring. Think Spring with me, will you? Thing harder! Really hard!

Laura's Feet in September, January, February and Today

2008-03-05T14:16:00.014-05:00

As we prepare for our trip to see Dr. Dobbs this weekend, I have been thinking some of what might happen when we are there. I know he'll examine her and go over our options with us. And I've assumed she'll come home with casts so I've been preparing her for that. I also decided that I needed to document where her feet were so we have a record here of where we were once again before we recast, IF we recast.

Getting a good picture of her feet is not easy. She is constantly moving and changing her weight distribution in an effort to avoid having to use her muscles to stand still. And when you finally get her to stand still, you can get several pictures of her feet that all look different due to the way she stands. However, I persisted and we have something to go by. These pictures are a pretty good indication of the way her feet look most of the time. Sometimes they look worse, sometimes much better. Consider these an average.

Here are some pictures from today:

Here are some pictures I took of her difficult foot a month ago and sent to Dr. Dobbs so he could see how she'd begun relapsing once again. You need to look closely to see that her heel has more tissue on the inside than it does on the outside and the very slight 'lean' her scar is developing once again:

And here were her beautiful feet the day after we removed her cast. They were so straight!!!

We don't know what will happen on Monday, but we do know that what we've done so far has had a tremendous impact. Here were her feet before we started seeing Dr. Dobbs in September. You can see just how pronounced her heel varus was and how high her arch was:

Again, we don't know the outcome yet for Monday but we do know that we're making progress and that perhaps, if we catch it soon enough, we can keep her feet on the right path long enough that they'll decide to stay put.

PUSH!

2008-03-04T10:42:00.002-05:00

This morning, after already posting a blog entry for the day, an email arrived in my inbox titled "PUSH". I didn't know the sender and thought I might just delete it but then realized my husband's name, along with a lot of folks at his office, were in the send to line so I figured it was probably from someone at his office. And it was. So I read it.

PUSH means
P.-----pray
U.----until
S.----something
H.----happens

Hmmmm... Should I pass it off as coincidence or do I take it as a big ol' whack in the head with a loving 2x4 from the Lord? I think, for sanity sake I'll take it as a mix of a little of both. In my ongoing frustration with not knowing what really needs to be done to fix Laura's feet for good and working very hard to avoid osteotomy surgery, the only option I know to do is pray while seeking the best care we can for her. Perhaps my problem is that I want the solution to come after just praying for a week, or two, or as it seems now, for months on and off. Perhaps I need to make this a point of my several times a day prayer for longer than when I get tired of praying and feel totally depressed about the whole thing. Perhaps PUSHing, continuing even when logic says you don't need to is part of what I need to learn. Perhaps persistence and dogged dedication to just giving up and trusting the Lord until my eyes cross and I can no longer stand the calluses on my knees is what I'm supposed to learn. Perhaps, just perhaps, I'm supposed to learn something else but I'll do it through this. I just don't know. But I'm willing to find out.

So I'm going to PUSH. I'll pray until something good happens. And I'll let you know how it goes. Care to join me?

The Clubfoot Saga Continues Right Along With Shoe Shopping!

2008-03-04T09:50:00.006-05:00

When Laura was released from her last round of casts and we set eyes on those perfectly straight little feet, it was all I could do not to cry. Tears of joy. Lots of them. I dreamed of buying shoes - lots of shoes - and totally enjoying life with just some SMO's to deal with for awhile. But as you might assume, it was not to be.

Within two weeks, her straight little foot was once again leaning the wrong way. Her heel varus will not stay corrected. I don't believe it is as bad as it once was, but it definitely isn't straight any more. However, she is not in pain again. And she's already outgrown the need to have her SMO's. She runs around the house like a champ from the moment she gets up until we put her to bed again that night. Her foot does seem to get tired when she's walking a lot without the SMO's so I use them anyway when she's wearing any type of shoe. Yes, there are some definite benefits and we are making progress. It just is slow going right now. And I find that not knowing what lies ahead is a very frustrating place to be.

We head to St. Louis again this weekend. Dr. Dobbs will be seeing us bright and early Monday morning at 7 AM where we'll discuss our options from here and most likely put her in another set of casts. I find myself wondering what new thing the medical community will learn from treating her. And I wonder just how gentle and understanding she'll be because of all she's been through.

I also keep wondering what it is that I'm supposed to learn from all of this besides how to drive to and from St. Louis with my eyes closed. Well, sort of. :) I'm sure there's something that I'm supposed to learn yet and I just haven't concurred it yet. Perhaps I need to keep relearning how to let go and let God handle it but I keep thinking I do that in this situation. Hmmmm... maybe there is something to that 'in this situation' thing... But what else? Perhaps I need to learn how to just be happy no matter what or to learn new research techniques to help find the answer or ???? I don't know. But I'll keep on keeping on until we solve her dilemma.

Meanwhile, I have discovered some great shoes and am dreaming about a few more. See Kai Run shoes work great with SMO's - that is what she's wearing in the picture. They are made wider than normal shoes so they fit and look completely normal on. No stretching over the inserts or not having the velcro strap reach where it is supposed to. I love See Kai Run shoes! We also discovered a pair of boots from Target that fit over them and we've been wearing those a lot. And the older style of Preschoolians fit great over SMO's, too, as long as you take the shoe insert out. But her Preschoolians are getting too small so it is time to find some new ones and I'm not sure their new style will work. But I'm going to try anyway if I can find a bargain. I keep wanting to buy something that fits and will go with some of her clothing that isn't pink, but since we are facing an unknown, I'm just browsing now and will buy something when I know what we have to deal with in the future. So I keep looking, and Laura is drooling and proclaiming "OH those are SOOO CUUUUUTE!" at every other pair. I fear she'll be fascinated with shoes for the rest of her life. But then that's not so bad. I'll just teach her to shop bargains!

Pinky Tuscadero Has Nothing On Laura But Her Name

2008-02-29T08:49:00.004-05:00

Through the years, I've had various experiences with trying to get myself dressed every day. Early in my life, my Mom had three classifications for my clothing: Church, school and play. Items purchased for one moved down to the next when it was no longer 'good enough' for its intended purchase. These guidelines were strictly enforced with not only my clothes, but my shoes. In other words, new tennies were NOT to be worn to play in. When you got home and headed out to play, you changed from head to toe ensuring your clothing would last longer in its nice state. When I became a Mom, this is how I classified the boys clothing. Hey, it works!

When I was old enough to start making my own decisions about my clothing, I had my own style based on just a few cherished pieces of clothing. Some of my fondest memories are wrapped up in a few specific outfits - the brown corduroy hip hugging pants with the plaid shirt, the denim skirt with the yellow shirt and of course my prized blue checked hip hugging bell bottoms that my Mom so carefully repaired for years so would last another season, paired with white t-shirts of various kinds. Yeah, I was a girl of simple tastes.

When I was pregnant with Laura and discovered through ultrasound that she would be a girl, I began to gleefully plan wardrobes full of pink, pink and more pink with a few dots of other colors just to balance out the palette. Hair ribbons, head bands, and barrettes danced in my dreams along with lacy socks and tights of all colors. I was actually going to get to shop for a girl instead of buy just the basics often offered for boys. I couldn't wait!

The night before I was due to deliver, my Mom took a picture of Laura's closet. Needless to say, it was all pink. Honestly. Two rows of nothing but pink. Well, there was some white and a bit of yellow and light blue in there, but honestly it was hard to see amidst all of the pink. Her room was pink (by default because that's how the previous owners had painted it so it worked!), her accessories so thoughtfully provided by friends were all pink, and her blankets, sheets and such were even pink! Yes, pink ruled the day. And I didn't mind. Apparently, neither did Laura!

Yes, pink is her color. When we look at hair accessories, shoes, tights, clothing, sleep sacks, toys, stuffed animals, babies, sleeping bags, and even food - if it is pink, she wants it. Totally. She is in love with pink from the bottom of her toes to the very tip top of the highest hair on her head. And sometimes, that can be so frustrating!

Let's take our usual morning routine. It goes something like this:
Me: Laura! It's time to get dressed. What do you think you'd like to wear today?
Laura: Pink.
Me: I know pink - but what? A dress? (If possible this is generally a given but pink winter dresses are hard to come by so when it is cold out, we have to compromise or do a light run daily. We compromise...)
I continue: Or how about a pair of jeans and a shirt?
Laura: Just pink, Mom.
Me: I know you want to wear pink. But what? A dress or pants? (I figure if I narrow it down, I can get somewhere)
Laura: Pink.
Me: *sigh* Okay, how about this outfit (holding up a comfy, warm one) or this outfit? (holding up another comfy, warm one)
Laura: No. I want Pink.
Me: Your pink ones are dirty. Do you want to wear this or this? Look, this one has some pink flowers up here on the shirt. How about that one?
Laura, looking over at her closet and plotting: No. I want to wear Pink. How about that one? (pointing to an outfit designated "to wear out" not "play")
Me: This or this.
Laura: Hmmmm... (still looking at her closet) How about the pink jeans? (for the record, they are in the wash)
Me, moving in to her line of vision so she can't see the closet: This or this
Laura, silent for a moment and then: JONATHAN! Can you come here for a minute?

Yes, she's plotted to get around me. She's calling for someone to save her from Mommy's choices. As I get her dressed in my pick for the day while she fusses, I realize I either need to quit leaving the closet door opened or I need to get more pink items for her to choose from.

Pink. Around here, it is more than just a color. It is a category of clothing all to itself. It is a lifestyle. It is... Laura.

Fort SnowBound

2008-02-27T15:25:00.005-05:00

After shoveling the snow for the second time today, the boys decided to build themselves some snow forts. As you can see from the picture above, the driveway is a wonderful place to have a good snowball fight. No windows are near and the piles from shoveling all of that snow off the driveway will make a great start. So they took advantage of a good thing when they saw it. Soon, several friends showed up to help but had to leave before the fun started. Here are their forts:

Jonathan finishing his 'Lower Bunk'.

Jonathan's Double Fort System complete with slide between them for quick getaways.

Matthew's Fort equipped for trench warfare.

The Trench system in all its glory.

I can only hope that I'll be tucked in to my favorite chair, watching a good movie with Laura and Don while cross stitching when the fun starts. Then again, I think they have plans for Dad... :)

Warehouse Storage At Work

2008-02-27T15:13:00.004-05:00

When we implemented a new Lego storage system for the boys mini Lego warehouse, I had high hopes but wasn't sure it would work. Here's proof it does! The boys take out the drawers containing the bricks they want to use, build what they want and then put the drawers back. No little pieces laying all over, no half finished projects as those just go in their own drawer until they are done. And the best part about it all is that I haven't done the 'Lego dance' for weeks. :) Score one for Mom!

Here is Matthew expressing his joy at having his picture taken once again. He'll learn soon enough that those long eyelashes and sweet smile photograph well. Meanwhile, I'll just keep on trying to catch him off guard.

Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow

2008-02-27T14:46:00.004-05:00

In keeping with the joys of living where we do, snow is just a part of winter here. I firmly believe that snow should only fall on December 24th and then disappear by December 26th, but alas the weathermen don't find my philosophy workable and continue to put snow in the forecast through April most of the time. This year, at least until the past two weeks, we were actually under our normal snowfall amounts and I was thrilled, hoping that it might mean an early spring. I was even contemplating the idea of baking some cookies for those normally obnoxious weathermen as a thank you. But then they had to go and blow it all.

Our local weathermen/women are a unique bunch. On one channel they are so laid back it is hard to tell that they even care about the weather although their weekend weather woman has a nice personality even if she has a size minus 2 waist. Then we have the channel where the weatherman has been there so long he's more of a fixture at the station than the bricks. And he's one of those laid back, don't get your feathers all in a bunch, kind of guys. To make matters even worse, he has all kinds of weird sayings that make you just want to roll your eyes when you watch him. Then there is what we fondly refer to as the 'jumping weatherman' on another channel. He usually forgoes his suit jacket, rolls up his sleeves and even removes his tie so it doesn't get in the way of his jumping, stooping and dancing in front of the green screen as he dodges weather fronts. Yeah, he's unique. And finally, we have the gleeful weatherman. The one that only really gets excited when the weather is at its worst. He loves to forecast the worst case scenarios, and gets a thrill from all of the headaches such a thing will cause. I am sure he even sleeps at the station when the biggies are coming in just because he likes them so much he doesn't want to miss it. And, he tends to interrupt regular programming when anything out of the ordinary happens. I think he might be a bit hyper. But he's lovable just the same so he's generally our pick to watch. We just take his forecasts down a notch or two and we know we're probably right on the money.

Last week, our excitable weatherman was in his element. We had several days of snow, the most so far this season, and he was gleefully rubbing his hands together as he shared what he thought would be the worst storm of the season. Uh... he was wrong. He should have waited a week. Over the weekend everyone started reporting that some snow was coming but they really didn't know how much. As Monday neared, a winter storm warning was called and we were told to expect 4 - 8 inches overall. By Tuesday morning, we were well on our way to that and today, it is still falling. And falling. And falling some more. Even he missed it by a mile. If HE can't even get it right when he exaggerates it, what is the world coming to???

But our house is not full of a bunch of curmudgeons. No, just two. The two who have to get out and get to work or run errands in it all. The rest of the household LOVES the snow. Gets great joy out of it, even. Laura, who has only been able to watch from afar because she was either medically fragile or unable to play in the snow due to casts and so on, found that she was in just the right place at just the right time to experience her first snow fall. The boys on the other hand find this type of heavy snowfall great for building forts, snowboarding down the slope of the yard, and in general having wonderfully cold fun. So, with a nod to those who tolerate the snow, the kids headed out to explore. Here are some pictures from the past two days.

Laura exploring the snow for the first time - ever!

Her first snow angel!!

Matthew, the Muscle Man clearing the driveway.

Jonathan helping do his part.

The boys, taking a break in the snow.

Lego Saves The Day, Or At Least An Hour Or Two

2008-02-22T12:14:00.006-05:00

There is something wonderful about having a son who willingly finds all sorts of creative things to do with his much younger sister. I imagine most ten year old boys can find many ways to avoid all of the girlie things that come with little sisters and Jonathan is no different. What he's done instead amazes me with its ingenuity. It is pure genius. He's gotten her to believe that little Lego men are just miniature dudes, er dolls. Dudes, er dolls that don't play house but protect it instead. And furthermore, they must practice and practice that protection just in case something ever happens and their small Lego abode must be defended from the evil ones, whoever they are.

Last week I needed to get things done and asked Jonathan to keep Laura busy. We offered her several options, but she could have cared less until I mentioned that perhaps they could go 'take some pictures'. Oh how she jumped on that. My budding photographer Jonathan is teaching his sister how to set up shots, too. Although his shots generally include toys instead of people, he does capture family memories regularly that I fail to see. Last week, he opted to make do with Legos as his subject matter. And in the midst of it all, the Lego dudes got to re-enact several possible attack scenarios. Ah, Legos. What would our house be without them?

Here's some pictures, taken by Jonathan, of the fun they had that day. Creative, isn't he? Oh, and the last one is my favorite. She stayed out of his way just as long as she could manage. Jonathan took it all in stride. And finally let her have the camera. I'd share those pictures but alas all of them are unidentifiable. I think I'm glad about that. I'm sure some of them included me and lots of dirty laundry!

Doing battle:

Laura preparing to bomb the entire thing in order to stop the invaders. She has yet to learn diplomacy...

Oh how she wants to rearrange them! But with great restraint she's waiting until Jonathan takes another picture.

And finally, she just had to see what Jonathan was seeing, didn't she? :)

Laura's New 'Friend'

2008-02-22T12:08:00.004-05:00

The last time I went in to my favorite thrift store, I scored what I have come to realize was one of my best deals. Yes, it was cheap and that sure is a nice bonus. But what was really wonderful was how much Laura enjoys her new 'friend'. Yes, Strawberry Shortcake has come to live with us. This version is just a few inches shorter than Laura and she loves to cuddle with her.

Here she is the first afternoon Strawberry arrived. And the bond of friendship necessitating constant companionship has only grown. But that's not so bad. Strawberry is a very amiable friend. She's never demanding, can accept being tossed aside for another, albeit smaller version of herself, and she is always waiting right where you put her for you to return and play once again. Yes, Strawberry is a great 'friend'. At least Laura thinks so! :)

Four Legged Entertainment

2008-02-22T11:21:00.004-05:00

Recently, we were privileged to welcome Murph in to our home for the day. Mom and Dad were heading out for some rest and relaxation together and didn't want to leave Murph home alone too long. The boys were thrilled to have him all to themselves for the day and I was thrilled that we could do something for Mom and Dad. After all, they give Don and I some rest and relaxation one night a month so it was the least we could do!

Anyway, Murph was well rested when he arrived and the boys took advantage of it. As you can see from the following, Murph and Matthew had a wonderful time playing tug of war. So wonderful, in fact, that Murph was tuckered out after awhile and preferred to just sit and chew a bit on his own. Poor thing. He'll have to go home and rest up for a few days. He's not used to dealing with the testosterone of a growing teenager any longer!

Choo Choo Trains?

2008-02-15T13:45:00.003-05:00

Laura, more than any of the others in the household, has the ability to "see" something fun in almost everything. She can make toys out of nothing and uses unique items for everyday things if she can't find the 'real' one. For instance, she uses anything long and thin for a baby bottle, turns anything - literally - in to a baby as long as she can wrap it up in something that might vaguely resemble a blanket, and she thinks anything or anyone is a 'friend' even if it isn't alive or she's never met them. Yes, she's creative and she likes it that way. Secretly, I do, too!

The other day I got out the beads and the shoelaces, hoping to work on her fine motor skills as well as her attention span. Sometimes it can be compared to that of a gnats. Anyway, as soon as we'd gotten about half way done with our beads, she jumped off the couch and started yelling "Choo Choo! Choo Choo!" while dragging them behind her. Cracked me up. By the time five minutes had passed, she'd created a whole story about who was on the trains, where they were going, and how long they could stay there before they had to turn around and head back home.

Where does she get that???

Valentine's Day Delights

2008-02-15T13:13:00.002-05:00

I had planned to make Valentine's Day special. Not just for the most wonderful Hubby in the world but for the kids, too. I wanted to make a nice dinner, eat by candlelight in a clean house, and make a Valentine's cake I knew they'd all love for dessert. I didn't share my plans with anyone so I shouldn't have been surprised when Don had some of his own.

Yesterday, each of us came down to find a wonderful box of chocolates on our desks. Mine had a love note and card attached to it from Don, and the kids each had their own box with a love note on it signed "Love Mom and Dad". As I looked at the joy on the boys faces I thought it was important for them to know that it wasn't Mom and Dad that had done that, but Dad. All on his own. Without any help from me. Without even a hint of a push, even. It was all him. When I shared that, I could tell it meant even more to them. Dad, not the normal gift buyer/take care of things person had gone out of his way to buy them something special and then hide it until the appropriate time came. I smiled with the joy of knowing I'd done just one more little thing to draw the 'men' in the family closer together.

Then, when all was quiet and relatively clean, I headed out to get the last minute things I needed to make the dinner special. I so wanted to find a meaningful gift for Don but alas that's difficult at best when you are on a budget. I've done things like coupons and such in the past, and we've got enough romance helpers to keep us enjoying that realm for years. So what to do?

I headed to Kohl's. Turns out they were having a wonderful clearance sale on robes. What better way to let him know that he is wrapped in my love than to give him a new, soft, cozy robe! Yes!!! Success! And on sale, sale, sale!!! Then it was off to Marc's for cards and something special for the kids. They needed no more chocolate so I thought I'd get them some nuts. They all love nuts and we can't seem to keep them in stock here because as soon as they are discovered, they are gone. Everyone got their own can/jar/whatever of their favorites. And since we're all a little nutty, it seemed to fit. :)

Later during dinner as we all sat together enjoying our steaks, I asked everyone to share something they appreciated about all of the others sitting at the table. And then I went first to kind of help them understand what I meant. I started with Jonathan. He's my bashful one and he tried to brush off my praise of his willingness to help and his ability to read others quietly and realize when they just need a hug. But I persisted. I think it was a good thing. He got quiet so I know he knew I meant it. I praised Matthew for his growing maturity and my pleasure with the young man he was becoming. And I thanked Laura for bringing such joy in to my life. I told Don how much I appreciated his loyalty and his love. And I thanked him for getting up every morning before the sun and heading off to work so I can stay home with the kids and take care of the family.

Then it was Jonathan's turn, followed by Matthew and then finally Don. I think the thing that was so evident was just how much the boys appreciate what Don does for them, how they really do get that we may not have a ton of material things but we have a great family that supports each other, and that he really does love them very much. Matthew also mentioned how much he loves it when Don shows him how to fix things and works with him on projects in the garage. I watched Don's face at that one. I know he was surprised at all that they said and I hope it helps him have more confidence at being a Dad even though he didn't start out with them from the beginning.

And through it all, I learned that they really do appreciate having clean laundry and relatively good meals. :) It is nice to know that they see the value of having a Mom who stays home with them and enjoys teaching them over the latest gadgets and 'stuff' that, in the long run, has little to no meaning later in life. Yes, it was a good day. A day to reflect on what is important about those we love and a time to tell them so. I'm so glad the Lord gave me Don. Through him, I have a new identity in life. That of a stay at home Mom. I can't think of a better place to be.

Stupid Cold

2008-02-11T07:46:00.000-05:00

Michelle has taught us many things on her annual visits here. I've learned much from watching her be a good Mom to her children, and she's shared a few family recipes that live on long after she's gone. She's also taught me about a thing or two about making life fun even when it isn't and she's taught me much about walking with the Lord and living in peace while stress rages around you. She has also taught or reinforced some things with the boys that live on long after she and her wonderful family leave us for a time. Things like respecting your elders, the value of daily prayer time shown by someone other than their mother and so on certainly have an impact in their lives. But perhaps the most enduring thing she leaves behind is just how 'stupid cold' it can get here. And I think she has absolutely no idea just how 'stupid cold' it can get!

As I type this we've already endured 24 hours of wind gusts over 50 MPH, a steady wind chill of up to 20 degrees below zero, and several inches of snow blowing all over the place. Over 500 schools, child care centers and other facilites have closed for the day because of the dangerously cold temps due to the high winds. I actually laughed when the snow plows came through our development yesterday. After all, whatever was left on the road for them to plow off would be almost instantly blown back on as soon as they passed. Or perhaps blown across the road and up against something else for awhile before being whipped aloft for a flight to another road for another snow plow to start the whole thing all over again.

Given the way our house sits, the wind periodically sounds like a freight train coming through and keeps the kids awake long after they should be sleeping. And we won't even mention how the cold just seems to seep in to every crack and crevice of the house. Especially one heated by a heat pump. Like there is some 'warmth' left in the air outside for it to extract and return to our house. Yeah, I'm buying that. NOT. It's pretty sad when going to the basement to do the laundry means you might actually feel a bit warmer because there is no sound of whipping wind to make you feel like you are living in an arctic wonderland. Needless to say, I finished processing Mount Dirty Duds yesterday and even scoured the house for more things to wash just for an excuse to escape the whirling winds on the first floor. Wow. Who knew?

Today we're expecting the highs here to actually get in to the teens. But for now, the temp is a whole 3 degrees, the wind chill is -19, and we're all in for the duration. And by tomorrow, we might add up to 8 inches of snow to the whole mess. But life goes on. Schooling at home means we can do what we want to do regarding school, wrapped up on our cozy blankets, playing math games and reading some good books. And periodically, we look out the window at our barren landscape of a neighborhood and say "Stupid cold! It's just stupid cold!". And we remember just how much we'd like to see Michelle and the kids again because we enjoy their company. And perhaps because we want to share with them just what 'stupid cold' really is. Yes, THIS is what stupid cold really is. What we wouldn't give to be able to share it with them. :)

Mommy, What Do You Dream About?

2008-02-08T11:21:00.000-05:00

In what I thought was just one of those 'passing' conversations with Laura yesterday, she was rambling on about something that she either watched or listened to as we read it to her. I was unsure as I wasn't paying much attention given I was doing something else at the time. But then she said "...that's what he dreamed about, Mommy. What do you dream about, Mommy? What?" Needless to say, I stopped and was very still for a moment. Immediately, I began to wonder just what it was I dreamed about. I didn't want to tell her about all of the thoughts I have, laying in bed during the night, planning to get things done tomorrow that didn't get done today. Or that I wake up wondering how long the house will say quiet before everyone wakes up and another day starts. No, that's not what she wanted to hear so instead, I asked her "What do you dream about, Laura?"

Her answer both surprised me and made me smile all at the same time. Given the number of times I am called down the hall by her in the middle of the night because she 'had a bad dream' or 'saw a monster', I figured it would be something ucky. But that isn't at all what she was going to say. Instead, she cocked her head, put her hand on my shoulder and said "I dream about Nana and Honey and Mommy and Daddy. They all love me so that's what I dream about." I smiled to hide the tears and just hugged her, reassuring her that indeed all of those people loved her very much. It was enough for her and she bounced off to find something else to occupy her mind. Changing subjects wasn't so easy for me.

I sat there for awhile, not moving, wondering first of all how someone so small comes to be so smart and so full of unconditional love herself. And then I began to wonder just what it is that I do dream about. I honestly don't remember very many of my dreams and know that those that happen in my half awake state have much more to do with trying to solve my everyday problems and declutter my life than having any deep meaning. But I know that I have dreams. Big dreams. Even at my age. :)

I dream of raising healthy, happy children who lead successful lives while dropping their perfect grandchildren off for an afternoon of crafting with grandma. I dream of decluttering my home and getting rid of things that have no meaning to us so we can enjoy life more without having to 'clean up' first. I dream of cooking more meals from scratch and ridding our house of HFCS as much as possible in order to make us healthier, happier people. I dream of spring, of walking again around the block, of gardening and trying once again to beat the rabbits to our growing vegetables. I dream of the day that Laura's feet are straight and stay that way. I dream of writing and being published. Of having a novel crack the top ten best sellers some week or writing a children's book that brings smiles to hundreds of small faces. I dream of being thin again. I dream of a new kitchen floor. I dream of redecorating our kitchen to better meet the needs of our family while putting in cabinets that aren't made of particle board. I dream of making a difference in my children's lives for the better. I dream of being the best wife I can be. I dream of being a wonderfully vibrant person.

Yes, I dream big. And some of those dreams have come true or are in process, and some have yet to be realized. But the important thing is that I dream. And then take one step at a time towards realizing those dreams. For now, raising my children to be the best they can be takes up much of my time and effort so the rest will just come along as we can fit it in. But someday, those dreams will all come to fruition in some way, or be changed to have more meaning in my life at that time. And I pray that someday, my daughter will dream big dreams, too. And that I'll be there to help her see them come true. She has plenty of time to dream. And plenty of wonderful dreams to develop. But for now, dreaming of Nana and Honey and Mommy and Daddy is enough. At least for the two of us. :)

Age Is Only A Number, Right?

2008-02-08T10:41:00.001-05:00

I have discovered that aging isn't all it is cracked up to be. Really. And if I had my druthers, I'd prefer to gain the wisdom of experience another way. But it seems that's not exactly an option. We're stuck with birthdays, such as they are. So despite the fact that in my mind I'm still a young, vibrant 25, I know that my body and my experiences tell me I'm much, much older. And getting older, in general, isn't very pleasant.

So, in my ongoing efforts to play the "Glad" game and find something wonderful in everything, I've decided to put my experiences to work. I'm going to overlook the new sags, aches and pains, and the impact all of that has on how I feel about my body, that seem to come weekly in my ever-aging self. I'm going to look past the pages on the calendar that tell me, without flinching or even caring, that I'm a year older. I'm going to forget that I've been through a few personal wars and back that seem to have added even more years to my life, and I'm going to conveniently disassociate myself from the realities of heading towards the half-century mark that means I'm really no longer 'young' but only perhaps 'young at heart'. Instead, I'm going to concentrate on figuring out the good in aging. After all, there has to be some, right?

So let's see... what might those be? I smile as I realize that one of the most wonderful things about aging is that you really realize just how much the small things that annoy us really don't matter in the great scheme of things. You are able to pick and choose your battles with much more clarity as we realize that we no longer need to prove anything to anyone but ourselves. You can let the little things just roll right off your back and know that it really won't matter next week, tomorrow or even by nightfall today. This, in and of itself, is a wonderfully freeing thing. If only we could learn this much earlier in our lives. Perhaps our children would come out differently. And perhaps our lives might have been a bit less bumpy along the way.

I have also come to realize that the wisdom that comes with having lived more life than your younger contemporaries means that you just know more about people, life and how things work in general. It means you can pick and choose your friends much more easily because you know more about people and how their personalities, both shown and hidden, may impact your life enabling you to pick those people who will add a joyful dimension rather than hinder it. And that those friends who do have meaning in your life are some of the most precious parts of your life. It means you can say "No" more often, knowing that your life will be more peaceful without having to live up to the expectation of others. It means that you can smile when other folks try to tell you how to live your life knowing that they really have no idea what your dreams and goals are, and that's okay. You can just walk away without the guilt of wondering if you're doing something right or wrong according to them following you home. It means that you can put your time and effort in to things that really count for you and your family, and not feel guilty about it because you realize that raising a stable, loving family who knows that the Lord is the core of their being and that you love them no matter what, makes a bigger contribution to the 'greater good' than anything else you can do. And you realize that all of these things mean more than recapturing your youth ever could.

Yes, aging definitely has some value. And today, as I move forward in the numbers game one more year, I'm going to work hard to remember that all of the good things that have come with aging means so much more to me as a person than being 25, even if it is only in my mind. :)

Happy Birthday to the older, much wiser Me!!!

Mount Dirty Duds

2008-02-08T09:38:00.000-05:00

Once again it seems I spent seven blissful days without peering in to the interior of my washing machine. Seven days without even peeking to see if something was left there, alone, to wonder where it's mate was. Seven days without even opening the dryer to discover the last load of towels from last week were sitting there, all alone. Cold and unloved. Seven days of clean smelling clothing found just where it they were supposed to be without wondering what might be waiting for me downstairs in the laundry room. And now, it seems I have seven days, or more, to wonder what in the world I was thinking!

It all started innocently enough. Really it did. After a successful night of shopping at my favorite thrift store along with a windfall of jeans Mom located for a buck somewhere in her travels for Jonathan, I knew the boys had enough jeans for a few days so a daily trip to the washing machine was not necessary. And certainly Laura's closet was full enough now that we no longer have to worry about having pants that will stretch over casts, so why would I need to throw a run of her clothing in? Surely my hubby has enough white shirts to go a week or more without washing, and we all have enough of those unmentionables to last a week or so, so why would laundry need to cross my mind??? Uhhhh... Needless to say, it didn't. Not even a flicker. Not a thread of thought. Not a sudsy blip on the ol' mental radar dared cross my laundry-free mind. And then reality hit.

Yesterday, after realizing that perhaps a bit too much time had passed since I'd had an intimate look inside my washer, I casually mentioned to Jonathan that I needed the laundry gathered and taken to the basement. He complied with my request without an ounce of protest. That should have been a clue. A clue that perhaps he'd been waiting with baited breath for a clean pair of jeans to hit his laundry pile. That perhaps he was tired of wearing sweats everywhere and actually was changing out of his dirty clothing more than once every two days creating an actual need for clean laundry that was so new none of us had yet realized it. Could it be that he was growing up and I failed to notice? Could it be that I had been lulled in to a quiet sense of security because for weeks I'd kept up on the laundry? Could it be that doing the laundry regularly for awhile, including folding and putting it away, had been so much easier that I'd failed to notice the change in everyone's attitude? I would certainly contemplate all of these issues an more as I rounded the corner in the basement and saw Mount Dirty Duds.

Yes. It's true. My week off was not such a good idea. I stopped dead in my tracks and peered at the mounds of laundry in front of me, my jaw hanging to my knees, wondering where it had all come from. As I walked ever more closely to the pile, a feeling of dread began to grow. How in the world was I going to conquer Mount Dirty Duds? Couldn't I just throw some of it away and pretend like the washer ate it? In my state of disbelief, I think I might have sobbed for a few minutes. And if I really think about it, I think I even saw the pile shudder in sympathy, reaching it's dirty arms out to embrace me as I slumped down on the stool wondering how long it would take me to finish. After all, before I got my act together and started doing the laundry on a regular basis, Mount Dirty Duds was a regular part of our life. And it was well acquainted with the flinging of clothing in to large, tippy piles and bins where those items unlucky enough to land in the bottom of the pile might not see the light of day for weeks. It was going to be a big job, but somehow I had to accomplish it.

Quietly, I opened the washer and peered in to its large capacity cavity. I imagined it giddy with excitement as it prepared to be the workhorse that it must be to keep us all in clean clothing, happy to once again be of service. I talked quietly to it, encouraging it to do the job quickly, making it a partner in my ambition to once again conquer Mount Dirty Duds. I think it might have winked. Oh wait, that was just the lid slamming down on my finger. None the less, we began again. Renewed partners in one of the biggest jobs in our household. I poured in the soap and started up the washer. She jiggled a moment as the cold water began to flow and then settled down, open-mouthed, ready to receive her next load. After filling her, I reached over to her partner in crime and started up the dryer to fluff the towels, removing a weeks worth of wrinkles and heating them up once again. Hot air filled the dryer once again as he came to life, willing to enter our alliance as was his duty. Yes, they are life partners. She and He. Standing together to support and assist us as needed. I'm sure the Kenmore family is very proud.

Slowly our joint efforts have had an impact. This morning Mount Dirty Duds is more like a small hill. The washer, dryer and I have formed an alliance of sorts. We have agreed that as long as I throw the dirty laundry in, they will give back clean, sweet smelling clothes to give and live for another day of hugging our bodies in an effort to keep us warm and socially acceptable. They will do their duty, as promised by Kenmore, and produce as much as I ask. And I, in turn, realize that I am the captain of my own expedition. And I'd rather walk up a hill than climb a mountain. I guess letting my 'partners in clean' go a week without me won't happen again any time soon. I've learned that partnerships only work if both sides are contributing. And I'm willing to do my part once again.

No, I'll no longer go a week without getting intimately close to my washer. And I think, deep down Matthew and Jonathan will quietly thank me. Some day. :)

Celebrating Birthdays from Four to Eighty-Two

2008-02-04T16:46:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we gathered together for another "Classic Family Sunday". Aside from the fact that we hadn't gotten together since Christmas due to our St. Louis fly bys, it was time to celebrate a few birthdays. Jan turned 82 at the end of last year, Laura was celebrating her 4th and I, well... I'll turn another year older, wiser and a bit more laid back this Friday. So we celebrated 'the girls' birthdays all together. We also took the time to catch up on life as we know it, see how much Libby has grown, and spend more time together just being a family.

Here are a few pictures from our day together:

Diane, Laura and Jonathan just before opening presents.

Don talking with his Mom.

Mom, Mikayla, Jarryd and Murph were talking in the background as well.

Laura loved her new baby and long sought after Kitty, now named 'Baby Sammie Kitty' lest we forget she is a cat.

And Libby. My how she's grown! She and Laura had a blast playing with paper. Wrapping paper, tissue paper and paper towels all kept Libby busy for quite awhile. And Laura had a good time, too.

My Baby Turns Four

2008-02-04T15:07:00.000-05:00

Laura turned four this weekend. Four. My baby is four. Four years old. Wow. Where does the time go?

I find it hard to believe that she's four and really not a 'baby' any longer. Hasn't been for a long time but still... she's so young. And then again, she's not. It seems like just yesterday when she came in to this world a little thing that 'mewed' more than cried. A medically fragile infant that wasn't supposed to make it past the first week, let alone four years. An infant that was supposed to need intensive interventions for the rest of her life born to parents that needed to face reality.

This year, as I think about my daughter, none of those things were really important any more. She's survived. We celebrated that when she turned two. She's now thriving. A true four year old going on 14 with Daddy wrapped around her little finger and Mommy trying hard to hold the line while training Daddy, too.

So what did I think about this year when evaluating my precious little gift? I thought about joy and laughter. I thought about love and comfort. I thought about the end of the growth of our family being the one who would test us the most and yet balance that with a quiet, patient personality wrapped up in a package so cute you just want to hug it. I thought about what her life has meant to all of us and how it has changed the boys for the better. I thought about how she's taught us all to perservere and continue to matter what the cost because you know it is the right thing to do. I thought about how much she is like her Daddy and yet, she's so much like me sometimes it scares me. And I thought about her smile and how it warms my heart.

My baby. She's four. She's been such a blessing. And she's going to be just fine. Here are a few pictures from her life so far. Going down memory lane just reminded me of how far she's really come.

Her g-tube was such a part of her for two years. Now it is hard to remember it at all.

One of her many sets of casts kept her feet at odd angles as we worked to recorrect her clubfeet.

More of her casts are shown here as she wishes she were outside instead of in.

The first time she dressed herself - almost without help. :)

Check out the socks... it was her ingenious way of carrying her things from room to room.

She LOVES to read.

Her first "big girl" braids.

The first time Jonathan dressed her while letting her pick out what she wanted to wear.

Our Princess... she is wearing casts under that gown. But she had a blast anyway. :)

And finally, her birthday. Can you tell what kind of cake she had for her birthday???

Look closer... Yes, it was indeed chocolate!

The Red Ruby Inn

2008-01-30T16:16:00.001-05:00

Each time we head to St. Louis for an appt. with Dr. Dobbs, we feel like we have our very own 'Red Ruby Inn' waiting for us. My Nana, more commonly known as Ruby, is always so excited to see us that it erases any doubts I have about making The Red Ruby Inn our home for the night. She literally dances she's so happy we've come to visit. Even if only for the night. She gives Mom and I the best bed in the house, lets the boys sleep on her couches and makes us a wonderfully warm dinner to welcome us and our grumbling tummies.

Here are a few pictures of our last visit. You can tell that we feel right at home, too.

Jonathan, resting on the couch while playing gameboy and watching the weather forecast.

Matthew, entertaining Laura who is really far too tired to still be awake.

Mom and Nana having a chat about our blog. Since Nana doesn't have a computer, Mom prints out each entry and sends them to her so she can enjoy them, too. This time she hand delivered them.

And our final picture before we drive off in to the sunrise once again. Nana's house will return to normal and she'll already be looking forward to the next time we come. Six weeks, Nana. We'll be back in six weeks! :)

Thief In The Night, Or At Least The Evening...

2008-01-30T16:03:00.000-05:00

After returning from our afternoon with Dr. Dobbs, we settled in to Nana's apartment for the evening. My Aunt Carol and Charles came over for dinner since they usually take Nana out on Thursdays, and Nana made my favorite soup. We ate together and visited for awhile, catching up on family fun. Then Carol and Charles left us to rest as we'd been up since 2 AM their time and we were tired.

While Mom, Nana and Carol were cleaning up I decided to give Don a call and catch him up on what had happened earlier in the day and let him know when we planned to arrive home the next day. When I arrived in our bedroom, the boys were already spread out on my bed playing their gameboys. I sat down to call Don and was soon joined by Laura, looking for something to do. When Carol and Charles were ready to leave, the boys laid down their gameboys and followed me out to say goodbye leaving Laura to her own devices. And she wasted no time.

Here's what I found when we returned:

Wait! What is that I see??? Could that be Laura under the end of the bed? What is that she's doing?

Ah yes! I see now... she's got the boys gameboys. Both of them! I think she wants to win no matter what the cost. Including harassment by her brothers! LOL

The boys took it very well. :)